Time Enough For Tears
by Rhiana Rae
Summary: Stephanie and Joe finally call it quits. Joe turns to Terry Gilman and Stephanie turns to Tastykakes. And Ranger. Another chapter in the life of the Bombshell Bounty Hunter. Written in the same format as the books.
1. I Never Loved You Anyway

Time Enough For Tears

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Chapter One- I Never Loved You Anyway

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To say it had been a really rough day would have been an understatement. I had bruises and scrapes on both my knees, my elbows were scraped and bleeding, and there were grass shavings in my hair. I really needed a doughnut.

I consoled myself with the fact that Harold Lipinski was safely back in jail, probably being bonded out again by Vinnie, my weasel of a cousin. Convicted of smacking around his wife _and_ his two kids, my wallet was considerably fatter and a dangerous man was off the streets. I hadn't even lost a pair of handcuffs. That was more than enough cause for Butterscotch Krimpets.

That decided, it took me mere nanoseconds to reach my apartment. It was a wet, rainy, icky Jersey day, and the gray sky was more than a little depressing. I took the elevator up, noticing the lack of Mrs. Bestler. It was a little early yet for her to be calling floors in the elevators, I supposed.

The little red message light on the machine was blinking. I pushed the button, and Morelli's voice bit out two curt words: Call me.

Great. That meant he'd heard from the station the state I'd been in when I'd dragged Harold in. Which in turn meant I'd get to hear for the hundredth time that I needed to either get a new job or make a decision. Quitting my job for a man was out of the question solely on principle. The 'decision' wasn't one I was ready to make. Not yet, at least.

I dropped a grape and a raisin into Rex's cage, smiling as he rushed out of his soup can, blinked his shiny, beady eyes at me, stuffed the food into his cheek pouch, and scurried back into his can. I suppose that was a pretty good greeting for a hamster.

Morelli was more difficult. I loved him, but probably not in the way required to have a steady relationship. Much less a marriage. He wanted me to change, to get a new job, do something less dangerous. Not that I hadn't evaluated the idea of another job many times. It was just that he wanted me to change. If he couldn't accept me for who I was and what I wanted in life then it wasn't really _me_ he wanted.

Satisfied with that resolve, I picked up the phone and dialed Morelli's home number.

"Talk," he said, not sounding happy at all. Probably been working. Of course, chances were also great that I was the reason he wasn't that happy.

"Hi, there," I said, putting on my happy-perky voice. "I just got your message and wanted to say hello."

Silence. Either he was really angry, or really surprised at my greeting. I hoped it was the latter.

"So, um, maybe I could bring over a pizza? I'm sure Bob wouldn't mind."

That at least forced him to talk. "Yeah, pizza is fine. We need to talk."

"Sure, I'll see you in an hour."

Disconnect.

I frowned at the phone. That was strange. Usually, there was more cheer in his disconnects than that.

Pushing that to the back of my brain, I had just enough time to shower and change clothes before going over to Joe's. I really needed to get the grass shavings out of my hair. And there was a slight chance of infection due to the dirt and gravel in the scrapes on my elbows and knees. They would be sore tomorrow. No naughty-nasty for me tonight, that was for sure.

Forty minutes later I emerged from the bedroom, feeling considerably more human than before. I'd managed to get my hair dried, not bothering with gel, and had added a little mascara to complete my almost-together ensemble. Jeans, boots, and my signature t-shirt completed the image. Stephanie Plum, Wonder Woman stand-in.

Almost.

I picked up the pizza from Pino's and made the drive to Morelli's house. It had been left to him by his Aunt Rose but was slowly coming under the influence of Morelli's style. It was now also occupied by a very large, reddish brown-haired dog named Bob, who thought the four major food groups were furniture, Chinese food, doughnuts, and Pino's pizza. The veterinarian said he was getting fat, so we tried to keep him from three of the four. Furniture was hard to doggie-proof.

Joe answered his door and gave me a brief, one-syllable "Hey."

"Hey, yourself." I put the pizza on the kitchen counter and pulled a beer from the refrigerator. Joe didn't. Something was definitely up.

I hitched one hip up on the counter and grabbed a slice of pizza, trying my best to act nonchalant. The problem is, Joe's been in my life since I was very young. He taught me how to play Choo-Choo. A part of me will be very upset if this conversation goes the way I think it's going to. When Morelli answers the door that way the conversation can only deteriorate.

"You said we needed to talk?"

He raked a hand through his hair and sighed. Damn, he was sexy. I put that thought on the back burner for later scrutiny.

"I can't do this anymore, Stephanie." Stephanie, not Cupcake. Yeah, he was pissed alright.

"What do you mean, 'you' can't do this anymore?" Great, it was going to be one of those chauvinist debates. I was really not in the mood for this. I just put a wife- and child-beater in jail, and now I get to deal with Joe and his feelings on my job and how I needed a new one. This was a tired, old argument, and one that never got resolved. I was unwilling to make that sacrifice for him, and he was unwilling to let it go.

"I'm tired of getting phone calls saying you look like you've been in a fight with a Pit Bull. I've got acid reflux, and I drink Maalox by the gallon. You're never safe, I never know where you are or what you're doing, and you never listen to me. You need a new job."

I gritted my teeth and tried to suppress my anger. "We've been over this before. I happen to like my job." Sometimes. "And where do you get off telling me how I should live my life?"

Joe shook his head, clearly disgusted. "This is what happens with us when we're together. We fight."

"Maybe because you're being a chauvinist asshole, because I won't do what you want!"

Maybe I shouldn't have said it quite that way. But it was too late. I was on a good mad, and I didn't intend to be pushed around anymore. I'd already moved out of Morelli's house and ended things a few times because of this. Obviously, it was more important to him that I do what he wanted rather than have a relationship, or we wouldn't be here again.

And I told him just that.

"What! I love you dammit!" he all but roared at me. I was sure phones were ringing at my mother's house right this very minute. In the Burg news travels fast.

"You don't love me, Joe, you love the idea you've created of me," I said. It made me sad, because a big part of me loved Joe. Really. But, like I thought before, it was all too apparent that the ultimatum still stood.

I put my piece of pizza down, set the beer back on the counter, and faced him straight-on. "You want a quaint little housewife to come home to every day, a little woman barefoot in the kitchen. What next, Joe? Going to take away my car keys and keep me a prisoner in your fantasy, letting me out when you think I need sunlight? I don't think so."

I grabbed my pocketbook and keys, and headed for the door. "If you want a relationship with me, then you're going to have to accept the _real_ me, like it or not. If that's too difficult for you…" I didn't finish my sentence.

I left. I had to before the tears became visible on my face.

I really hated fighting with Morelli. But I hated being ordered around even more.

Surprisingly, my indignant rage carried me all of two blocks before I had to put my Escape in park before I had an accident. I let the tears come for all of fifteen seconds before stiffening my spine. I was down to very small whimpers now, and felt pretty good about my self-control, considering I had pretty much put us on _off-again_ status once more.

When Morelli's SUV rolled past me, I jumped, thinking he must have come looking for me. But he just kept on driving.

If I had been a cat, I'd have been killed already. I slammed the Escape into drive and began tailing him at a far distance. I could still see his taillights, so I would know where he was going.

When he whipped into the parking lot of the bar, I hit the brakes. I'd never seen him get angry enough that he went to a bar before.

I stayed in the car and watched him go inside. I stayed and waited what seemed like very long minutes. Surely he would come out soon.

Unless he was drinking. Heavily. Shit. He never drank heavily.

It was hard not to immediately go in after him and apologize. But this time I had nothing to apologize for. Hard as it was, I was at my end, and thisclose to calling us _off-again_ permanently.

Forty-eight minutes later, I was really getting curious.

I crept inside, hoping Morelli wouldn't look at the door when it opened. There was a table in the back, and I took to Ranger's mode of surveillance: back to the wall, in the shadows. I wasn't sure that I pulled it off as nicely, but I was pretty much out of sight.

I spied Morelli at the bar. He was tossing back a shot of something amber, and evidence of a few more sat in front of him. I saw a slender arm reach out and touch his hand, and slid to the right to try and get a better view.

The slender arm led up to slender shoulders, slender neck, delicate face, and short blonde hair.

Terry Gilman.

What the hell? Why was she here? It slowly sank in that either this was one hell of a coincidence, or Morelli had called her.

Now I was really getting mad. But I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. I mean, last time Lula gave me the idea he might be cheating on me with her at some skanky motel it turned out to be a sting operation. No cheating involved. But he _did_ smile at the thought of her in a thong. Maybe I would just hang around a few minutes longer.

Joe was just sitting there. It seemed he was saying something, but Terry didn't really seem interested in what was coming out of his mouth. It gave me time to realize what a big fat hypocrite I was, following him here. His relationship with Terry was probably not unlike my relationship with Ranger, my mentor and tormentor. Even though we'd been 'off' when we'd had our one night together, the sexual tension was still there. I couldn't deny it any more than he could. Of course, there were limits to our relationship now. We weren't getting anywhere because

Terry grabbed Morelli's hand and all but dragged him off his barstool, out onto the crowded dance floor. She had obviously just come from work. Dressed in a dark blue pinstripe suit, elegantly tailored to fit her feminine frame, she didn't exactly reek of 'barfly.' No, she came here for a purpose. This was not a chance meeting.

A fast song began, and she began dancing with Morelli. Then Morelli began dancing with her. I'd seen that kind of dancing pretty much up close and personal before.

Except I'd been naked.

Terry flashed him a smile of bright white teeth, a smile he didn't return. He was still angry, but Terry didn't seem to mind being used. The air-humping continued until I was sure I was going to choke on the rage boiling in my throat. Digesting this would take some time. We'd been in many arguments before, but he'd never done anything like this.

I could see the words 'off-again' flashing permanently somewhere in the back of my brain. I shoved them away for later contemplation.

Then Morelli wrapped both arms around Terry's waist, dragged her body hard against him, and crushed her mouth with his. Her arms greedily went around his neck, and they got very passionate about the whole thing.

Little black dots crowded in on my vision and clanging began in the back of my head. I ducked down under the table and put my head between my knees until the bells stopped, and stood up.

I walked over to Morelli's back and tapped on his shoulder. He turned, his eyes widening at the sight of me.

And I punched him right in the face.

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	2. Long Night

Time Enough For Tears 

Chapter Two- Long Night 

I'm not sure how I got home. I remember putting my car into park and then at some point changing my clothes.

I woke up the next morning with my head pounding and my eyelids feeling stuck together. Also, I apparently had forgotten to wash off my mascara before passing out. The one thing I did remember with absolute certainty was crying myself to sleep. Maybe that was why my eyes were stuck together.

I dragged myself into the bathroom and got in the shower without even looking in the mirror. When I was sufficiently pruney I decided I should get out before I slid down the drain. A throb had begun in my hand and my headache still hadn't subsided.

I was suffering classic break-up symptoms. Great. At least I'd managed to get the waterworks under control. It wouldn't due to fall apart in front of Lula or Connie. Not a good idea.

And, I thought to myself as I left the bathroom, it really _was_ that time of the month. Yeesh.

Could my life just get better or what?

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Lucky for me, Connie had work ready and waiting when I attempted to breeze in the door. My breezing just wasn't on peak today. Maybe next time.

"It's been a busy week," she said, waving three files at me. "Just got these in today, and there's another came in yesterday. All FTA."

Duh. "Hmm," I said, flipping through the files. This would be sufficient enough to keep me busy until I got over my semi-broken heart. I figure this was my numb stage. The real hysterical breakdown was likely close on my heels.

"Donna Pogue, wanted for vandalizing her ex-boyfriend's car. This is a pretty high bond," I said, raising an eyebrow at Connie.

"Read on," she said, brushing powdered sugar off her black sweater. Closely following the gesture was a box of donuts that she offered to me. I snatched one and bit into it. Heaven. Pure heaven. "She set it on fire."

"What!"

"Blew it up. Don't ask me," she said, holding her hands up.

Okay, moving on. "Eddie Kalietry. Wanted for possession. Arnie Deusenhafel- What the hell kind of name is that!" I said, reading it again.

Connie shrugged.

"Wanted for rape and assault. And…" I flipped the last file open. "Stuart Baggett! What did he do this time?"

Connie smiled. "Held up a convenience store."

"You've got to be kidding! Stuart?!"

"The same."

Stuart Baggett was a boil on the butt of creation. He'd already made mine and Lula's life miserable once before. But this was an entirely different league of crime.

"What the hell possessed that little cocker-spaniel to hold up a convenience store!?"

"Probably got fired from Cluck In A Bucket," Connie said, biting into another donut.

Lula chose that moment to saunter into the office, late as usual. Connie rolled her eyes and muttered something in Italian.

"I can't do a damn thing with my hair in this weather," she said, plopping down on a chair that looked like it would groan out loud if it could. Though Lula was a former 'ho, she hadn't bothered to trade in her wardrobe. Today she was sporting neon green spandex, and a bright pink fuzzy sweater with matching fuzzy boots. In a way, I admired her for her courage. It would take a whole bottle of tequila to get me into spandex.

"So, where are we going today?" Lula wanted to know, looking at the files in my hands.

I told her about Stuart Baggett.

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	3. The Long And Winding Road

**Time Enough For Tears**

Chatper Three- The Long And Winding Road 

Lula's eyes widened. "That little skinny-ass white boy? I still got me a mind to kick his scrawny ass." She paused for a moment, and looked back at me. "What'd he do?"

My mouth twitched, almost in perfect imitation of Ranger's almost-smile. "Held up a convenience store."

"What!" Lula said. "What the hell possessed him to do that?!"

Connie and I grinned at my earlier words.

"Who knows," I said, "but it's early. If we hurry, we can get to his parents' house before he goes to work. He probably still is going to work."

Stuart Baggett thought his charm could get him out of anything, and that the world should definitely accomadate him, if not just for his charm alone. It made me ill. I was already feeling the beginnings of a twitch in my right eye, and I put my finger there to stop it.

"You got that eye twitch again?" Lula asked. "You should get that looked at."

"I'm fine," I said. "Come on, let's get going. With any luck, we'll get Stuart booked within the hour."

Lula grinned. "This should be fun. I'd like to put his bony ass behind bars."

Just then Connie went stock still and stared outside at the sidewalk. Lula sucked in a deep breath, and the hairs stood up on my forearms. Only one man made the hairs on my arm stand up just from being on the same block. Ranger.

The man in question stopped close behind me and placed his hand on the small of my back. Possessive. Gentle. "Babe," he said softly, making goosebumps on the back of my neck.

He smelled edible. I knew now that he used a shower gel called Bulgari. His housekeeper, Ella, bought it for him after smelling a sample her sister gave her. She thought then that it suited him, and I had to agree. If we had been alone, I might have had trouble not ripping his clothes off him. But then there was Morelli.

That brought a stab of pain to my heart, and I stiffened. Ranger must have sensed something because he leaned in close and brushed his lips across my ear. "I want to talk to you. Outside," he said, and left.

Connie fanned herself with a file folder. Lula had almost bitten through her bottom lip. "I swear, that man looks at you like you're dessert," she said. "I'm wetting myself."

I rolled my eyes at the both of them. Truth was, I was pretty close to wetting myself, too. The thought of Ranger's lips on any part of my body had me in a state. And, thanks to living in his apartment, I now had the mental image of him without underwear. Yeesh.

Ranger was standing outside, leaning against his black Porsche Turbo. Dressed in his usual black, his hair slicked back in the usual pony tail, he looked tall and dark and dangerous. And completely sexy. No amount of grief over Morelli could turn off my feminine reaction to him. I mean, I wasn't _dead_, and that's what you'd have to be to not respond to Ranger.

"I'm guessing you heard what happened," I said, not quite able to look him in the eye. I settled for a point directly over his left shoulder, pretending to be staring at someone walking down the street.

"Babe," he said, pushing off the car. For a minute I thought he might try to pull me to him. When he didn't, I was almost relieved. I may have dissolved in a puddle of waterworks, and that would have been embarrassing. Ranger was really good at being a tough guy, but no matter how long I had done this job I was still really crappy at it. I figure that balances us out.

"It was Terry Gilman," I blurted out, not entirely sure my brain was still connected to my mouth. "Joe called her after we had our fight. I, um, I punched him," I finished lamely.

That got me the full-on, thousand watt, Ranger smile. "I heard. He's got a hell of a black eye."

My mouth dropped. "I gave him a black eye?"

He just went on smiling.

Wow. I had given Morelli a black eye. I guess I was pretty mad. Come to think of it, I was still pretty mad. I had rage to work off.

"So," he said casually, "I guess it's a good thing you're not living with him, then."

"Yeah, no more moving out." Truthfully, I was really torn up about all this. My life was upside down. Morelli and I were done. For good, this time, not just _off-again_.

And it was breaking my heart. Dammit. I needed to do something. Something very possibly violent.

"Need a sparring partner?" I asked, and Ranger smiled again. He seemed to really be enjoying this.

"Probably not safe. My health insurance doesn't cover manmade disasters."

I gave him my best pissy look.

"I do have a job for you, if you're interested," he said, ruffling my hair.

I crossed my arms and leaned against his Porsche, trying to imitate his stance. I failed miserably, but his smile stayed in place.

"What do you need me to do?" Ranger's jobs most of the time involved throwing people around, and out windows. I had worked for him once before but decided it was in everyone's best interest if I terminated our partnership. Apparently, that was a one-sided feeling, or Ranger wouldn't be asking me this.

"Distraction. The guy's name is Vino Santinni. I've been employed to recover a certain object from his room at a local hotel. He spends most of his time in the lounge. All you have to do is keep his attention long enough for us to get up to his room and find it."

"And what is this object you've been hired to find?" I asked.

He just looked at me. I blew out a sigh and looked down at my shoes. I could really use the extra money. I was thinking I needed a whole new wardrobe to combat my sudden Morelli-lessness. Something to make me feel sexy.

"I could make you feel sexy again," Ranger said, and my mouth dropped.

"How do you do that?"

He raised an eyebrow at me.

I huffed and tried to look annoyed. "Okay, when is this job?"

"I'll pick you up tonight at six. He's staying at the Ritz, downtown."

"Fine by me. How much of a distraction are we talking about, exactly? I mean, full-on slutty or just a little make-up and heels?"

He looked at me and his eyes darkened, making my pulse race under his stare.

"Babe," he said. And he was gone.

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Lula and I stopped at Stuart's parents' house first. We got lucky on the first try. His mother answered the door and looked blankly at us.

"Hello," I said, nervous because I didn't know if Lula was going to do something crazy. "We came by to say hello to Stuart. We heard he was in some sort of trouble and thought maybe we could help." I bit my tongue hard, trying not to wince at how easily the lie had slipped off my tongue.

His mother nodded and opened the door, leading us into the living room. I shifted the cuffs out of my back pocket and held them behind my back, ready for use. If I lost one more pair Vinnie was going to start taking a percentage.

"Wait here," she said, "I'll let Stuart know he has visitors." She looked suspicious, but there was nothing she could say.

A few seconds later Stuart poked his bland face around the corner, saw us, and bolted for the back door.

"Shit," I said, sprinting after him. "Lula, get the car!"

Lula surprised me. She could move pretty fast for her size. All I saw was a blur of pink and green out the corner of my eye as I burst through the back screen door. Stuart was running down the sidewalk at full speed, and I was chasing after him. Again.

Just then Lula's firebird jumped the curb right in front of Stuart and stopped. His brakes didn't work quickly enough to keep him from smacking right into it. "Whoof!" he said, his air expelling from his lungs.

I was on him in a second, both his hands cuffed behind his back. "Hey, wait a second," he said, smiling suddenly. Trying the charm. Unh. "I have to be at work soon. You wouldn't want to make me look bad for my boss, would you?"

Something about him reminded me of something about Morelli, and I slammed him against the side of the car. Hard. "Shut up," I said.

In the driver's seat, Lula's eyes went wide. She managed to close her mouth by the time I stuffed him in the backseat and dropped in next to her. "What was that?" she asked me, putting the car into drive.

"I don't wanna talk about it," I said, looking out the window.

"Talk about it, hell," Lula said. "I'm only your partner after all. Why should you talk to me? Hunh," she said, miffed.

"Morelli and I had a fight last night," I said, managing to keep my voice at a monotonous level. No hysteria at all. "He went to a bar after he thought I left and started making out with Terry Gilman. I punched him in the face and I left." The last bit came out a bit rushed.

Lula screeched to a stop at the next intersection and gaped at me. "He did- you- what!"

"Yeah, that was my reaction," I said sullenly, still staring out the window.

"This subject ain't closed. We're dropping pasty off at the clink and then you and me are going to talk. Over fries and a milkshake," she added.

Fine with me. I could probably benefit from telling someone how seriously pissed off I was. I didn't want to think about the hurt part of it yet. That was for later. When I had Tastykakes. And maybe some Cheez Doodles. Yeah, it was definitely a subject for comfort food.

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I dragged Stuart out of Lula's Firebird at the jail and turned to face her. "You're going to be here when I get back. Right?"

Lula nodded vigorously. "You bet. Would I ever leave you stranded? Nope, not me. I'll be right here. Waiting."

I rolled my eyes and hauled Stuart inside. He'd gone surprisingly quiet and it had me worried.

"I'm going to jail," he said despondently, probably not to me in particular. I think he was just trying it out to qualify it was true.

"Yeah," I said, without much sympathy. Seeing his face a second time had done nothing for my mood. I did actually feel bad I slammed him up against the car, but I was a woman on the edge. "Maybe you shouldn't hold up any more convenience stores."

"Yeah," he repeated back to me. "I guess robbery isn't really my thing."

"Maybe you should go back to being Mr. Cluck," I said, not comfortable with the moody Stuart.

"Yeah."

The one-syllable thing I figured was going to turn repetitious, so I left him waiting to collect my body receipt.

Fifteen minutes later I was outside the jail, body receipt in hand. I'd made a little money today. Life was good.

And Lula was gone.

Huffing, I pulled my cell phone out of my pocketbook and punched in a number. Just as quickly I disconnected. Shit. Out of habit I'd dialed Morelli's number. That was no longer a valid option for me. So I called Lula.

"Get your ass back here and pick me up," I said through clenched teeth.

"You know, I'd love to, but Connie's got me filing my ass off. Besides, you know I have a thing about cops. They give me the runs."

Disconnect.

It took extreme self control not to throw the phone against the wall. Unfortunately, that wasn't a good vent for my anger because then I'd just be without a phone, and I couldn't exactly afford a new one at the moment.

My only other option was Ranger, unless I wanted to call a cab. And frankly, Ranger scared me a lot less than the cab idea did.

I punched his speed dial number before I lost my courage and forced myself to stay on the line.

"Yo," he said.

"Yo, yourself. I don't suppose you're available…"

"She left you, didn't she?" he said. I could almost see the corners of his mouth tipping up.

"She does this every time! Do I learn? No!"

"Babe," he said, and disconnected.

Two minutes later his black Porsche purred to a stop at the curb. I angled in next to Ranger and looked at him. "Thank you," I said. I really hoped he hadn't been in the middle of something when I called. Of course, I hadn't thought about that either. If I had I would have lost my courage and never made the call in the first place. Mentally, I slapped myself. _Coward_.

"I smell burning rubber, babe," Ranger said, glancing at me in the rearview mirror. "You're thinking again."

I sent him a pissy look, and he smiled. Shortly after, he slipped into his driving zone, and I was left with my thoughts. Leaving me with my thoughts wasn't a good thing, because the second I had time to think it was about Morelli. Damn. Like that was what I needed right now, moping in front of Batman. Geez.

We pulled up to the office, but he left the car idling. "Thanks a lot for the ride," I said. "I'll see you tonight!"

Before I could get out of my seatbelt he grabbed my wrist. His eyes were very dark, and the line of his mouth was tight. "You deserve better, babe," he said. He lifted my wrist and placed a kiss on the inside of my palm. "See you at six."

I could only nod a reply, before I scuttled my ass out of the car. Under normal circumstances, Ranger kissing my palm would have gone straight to my doodah. Instead, it went to an entirely different place, much much further north. I was in serious danger of crying in front of him, and that was not an option.

When I reached the relative safety of the office, Lula and Connie were looking at me expectantly. There were fries, burgers, and milkshakes in front of them. My lip started trembling, but I bit down on it. No way in hell was I crying. Nope.

Lula saw the danger signs first and passed me a McDonald's bag and a big shake. "Here," she said. "Eat something. You can't cry if you're chewing. It's a scientific fact."

Connie nodded her head in agreement. I didn't feel much like eating anymore, but what the hell, it was worth a try. And there was nothing better than greasy McDonald's fries.

The first taste of the salt and grease in my mouth and I knew it was true. I was already feeling better. I looked at Connie and Lula. "So I suppose you're wondering what happened," I started. I wasn't really into going over this yet, but if I didn't do it now it would have to be later. Now was better. Now I was still numb, and the whole breakdown thing hadn't happened yet.

So I told them the story, right up to punching him in the face. I left out the part about me crying myself to sleep because it wasn't pertinent information.

"What a bastard," Lula said, wiping her greasy fingers. "I should have sat on him when I had the chance."

Connie nodded. "The gorgeous ones always are." She was calmer than Lula, but I think she was still mad at him for my benefit. "I have relatives," she said conversationally, taking a sip of her shake and studying her bright red manicure. "I could make a phone call."

"No!" I said. "No phone calls! I don't want him taken care of," I said, rushing to prevent Morelli's fate being decided by the Mob. Even if he was a rat, he didn't deserve that. Not yet, anyway. Maybe when the breakdown came. No! What was I thinking? I needed a doughnut. I needed ice cream. Tastykakes. Anything.

"I think I should go try for another skip," I said, announcing it more to myself than anyone else. I needed to keep myself busy, or I was going to go insane. "Maybe I'll try for that Deusenheufelsel-whatever-his-name-is." Then I remembered he was up for rape and assault. "Is this a first-time conviction?" I asked Connie.

She shook her head. "Nope, this is his third time. He gets convicted this time he's going far, far away."

"Maybe you should let Ranger handle this one," Lula hedged. I think she was remembering how I slammed Stuart against the car.

"No, I'll take him. It's a pretty high bond too. I could use the money." And I'm really pissed off, I thought to myself. Just pissed off enough to actually do something right for a change.

"Well, I ain't lettin' you go off and mess with no rapist alone," Lula said, hauling her ass out of the chair. "I'm goin' with you. I got my Glock all nice and ready to go, right here," she said, patting her purse.

"Probably we won't have to shoot him," I said, picking up my stuff.

"He should be home right now," Connie volunteered. "He's got no job, so that's probably your best bet."

I nodded and stepped outside. My Escape didn't look as badass as Ranger's Turbo, but at least it was mine.

Lula cranked up Godsmack and we motored off to Arnie D's house. I think Arnie D is a much better name than whatever the heck that was. Trendier. He'd probably thank me. Or he'd try and shoot me, whatever came first.

We pulled up in front of a very large, very scrubby looking apartment building exactly fifteen minutes later. Windows had blankets hanging over them to replace broken glass. Somewhere I heard a baby crying. I had to double-check to make sure we weren't on Stark Street.

"This place gives me the creeps," Lula said, shifting from foot to foot.

I had to admit, it gave me the creeps, too. Maybe giving this to Ranger wasn't such a good idea.

Just as I finished the thought, a very familiar black car pulled up behind my Escape. Ranger angled out from behind the steering wheel, looked at the building, and looked back at me. "Babe," he said, shaking his head.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded. I silently thanked him for saving me the embarrassing phone call.

"I stopped by the office to pick up a check. Connie said you were on your way here." He stepped closer and looked at my pocketbook. "Where is your gun?"

"Lula has one," I pointed out. This didn't look good for me. I was going to apprehend a very dangerous rapist without a gun. I needed to take a step back and think once in a while.

He looked at me, full eye of the tiger thing going, and the corners of his mouth tipped up a fraction. He went to the car and pulled out a .38 revolver. The same gun I had at home in my cookie jar. When he turned to stalk closer to me it took everything I had not to yelp and run away. Miraculously, I stood my ground.

I didn't yelp until he put his arms around me, pulled my t-shirt out of my waistband, and stuffed the gun there. The imprint of his hand all but burned my skin and made me want to rip his clothes off. Or run away.

He smiled at me and pulled the t-shirt back over the gun. "Better," he said.

Lula's eyes were wide and her mouth was hanging open. She was probably wetting herself again. "Right," I said, "this is an apartment, and it says he lives on the fifth floor, so we don't have to worry about back doors."

"No, just fire escapes," Lula said.

Ranger looked at her. "You stay here and cover the fire escape, in case he goes out the window."

Lula looked like she might say something but, being as it was Ranger, thought better of it and closed her mouth.

"We shouldn't be long," I said, and Ranger and I headed inside.

The minute we stepped inside the confines of the building I was grateful to have Ranger's muscles with me. It was dark and smelled strongly of urine in the hallways, and the reliability of the elevator was definitely in question. "We'll take the stairs," Ranger said. He looked at me. "Unless you'd rather take the elevator."

"We could get stuck," I pointed out.

"That's what I was hoping," he said, and flashed me a smile.

Flustered, I set off up the stairs ahead of him. The stairwell was very narrow, and now I had another problem. My ass was directly in Ranger's line of vision. I was going to start having a fit. Or I was going to faint. Or trip. And then suddenly all I could think was _no underwear!!!_

I could hear him laugh softly behind me, and it made me wonder how he always knew what I was thinking.

The flights of stairs seemed unending, and I was puffing by the time we got to the fifth floor. Ranger flashed me a look. "Don't even consider telling me I should run, or I'll stun gun you." He grinned and went to apartment 5C.

"I want you to stay out of the way of the door," he said. "You aren't wearing a vest, are you?"

I smiled.

"Shit," he said, and knocked on the door.

A sullen-faced black man cracked the door. He had a black do-rag on, and a big scar through his right cheek. This didn't look like any Arnie Deusenheffel-Duesenfel- Hell. He wasn't no Arnie D that I ever thought of, that's for sure.

"Arnold Deusenhafel?" he asked, and I gaped out of sheer wonder that he could even pronounce the word.

"Who wants to know?"

"I work for Vincent Plum bonds, and you're in violation of your bond agreement."

Slam. Right in Ranger's face.

Ranger sighed and put his boot to the door. It flew open just in time to see Arnie throwing open the window. He was headed for the fire escape. Ranger grabbed my stun gun, crossed the room in three strides, and pressed it to Arnie D's retreating ass. The guy gave a slight "Unh," and went down like a stack of bricks.

"You stun gunned him in the ass," I said.

Ranger smiled. "He was evading."

Fifteen minutes later we had Arnie D trussed up in the back of my Escape.

"Thanks a lot," I said to him as he stepped over to his car.

His eyes darkened, and he straightened my jacket collar before tucking a stray curl behind my ear. The slight touch went straight south, and my knees almost buckled. "You owe me, babe. And I can't help thinking that guilt problem isn't such a problem anymore." He got into his Turbo and drove away. I wondered briefly if he was going to the Batcave.

Lula and I stopped for lunch at Cluck In A Bucket after getting my check from Connie. My bank account had just expanded more today than it had in the last six months. And now I wanted to go shopping.

"Let's go to the mall," I told her. "I need shoes. And new underwear. And a new wardrobe."

Lula grinned at me. "Yeah, if I were you I'd want more basic black too."

"I just need new clothes. You know, a fresh start. Or maybe I just want to spend some of this money that's burning a hole in my pocket."

"Fuckin' A."

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	4. Looking In The Eyes Of Love

**Time Enough For Tears**

**Chapter Four- Looking In The Eyes Of Love**

The mall wasn't crowded this time of day, and there were plenty of places I wanted to go. "I'm feeling underwear first, then clothes, then shoes," I said.

Lula nodded. "First step, Victoria's Secret."

I was like a kid in a candy store. Not only could I buy black underwear guilt-free (I thought of Ranger everytime I thought of black, now. It was the strangest thing.), I could also afford it. I spent thirty minutes in the store, and came out with two big shopping bags. Black lace panties and bra, red, white, more black panties, a bunch of cute boyshort-type underwear in lots of black. I also bought a few pairs of multi-colored bikinis, and to really shock myself, I bought a black garter belt and thigh-high stockings.

"Wow," Lula said as we walked out of the store. "I think you could just buy stock and it would be cheaper."

I was exhilarated from the shopping, and slightly out of breath. I checked my watch. Plenty of time for a few new outfits and shoes before I had to be back at my apartment to get ready.

"This is going to be a good day," I stated firmly.

"Let's stop and get a pretzel," Lula said, shifting her small shopping bag. I didn't ask what was in it, and she didn't tell. I didn't want to know.

Pretzels in one hand, shopping bags dangling, we set off for clothes shopping paradise.

"What do you think of this?" I asked Lula as I came out of the dressing room. It was another short black skirt, but at least it was new. I had also found a very, very daring top. It was red satin, in an Oriental print, and tied with three ties at my back and a halter around my neck. I couldn't believe I was even trying it on, much less considering buying it. But maybe I was feeling daring enough to wear it in front of Ranger. Maybe.

"Dang, girl," Lula said around a mouthful of pretzel. She dipped another bite in cheese sauce and nodded. "That's a really doozie of a top."

I turned around in front of the mirror and appraised the situation. The top was definitely daring, and the price tag was enough to stop the rest of my shopping. Well, at least the rest of my clothes shopping. I still needed shoes. Shoes I could justify. Shoes were comfort food. And I had a wounded heart. That was more than enough reason to spend more money on shoes.

I had a moment of panic and tossed it off. Today was confident me day. If I could just keep from turning my back on Ranger tonight, I would be okay. That shouldn't be too hard. Just don't turn around. At all.

"Okay. I'm taking it," I said, and marched back into the dressing room.

I paid for the skirt and shirt, bought a pair of sparkly dangly earrings that were next to the counter, and made a beeline for the shoe store.

Lula quickly found about fifty pairs of shoes she had to have, and modeled them around the store, asking my opinion on them. After a pair of bright pink stiletto fuzzy boots, white sandals with pink rhinestones, yellow flip-flops, and a really off-choice of brown moccasins. "Those are just wrong," I told her. "Take them off."

"Hunh," Lula said, sitting down and kicking the shoes off. "A big girl can't get by with wearing comfy shoes. She gotta wear slut shoes to make up for the extra curves."

'Curves' seemed to be pushing it a bit, but I kept my mouth shut. Lula was a little sensitive about her weight.

"I'm taking these," I said, holding up a pair of black stiletto heels. They were skimpy and strappy and wrapped around my ankle. Perfect for distracting a man. _And_ the one I was being hired to distract. I couldn't forget him.

The shoes, clothes, and Victoria's Secret bags all went into the back of my Escape, and we motored off to the office. It was getting late, and Connie had already closed up shop. I dropped Lula off at her car and roared off to my apartment, anxious to start getting ready to meet Ranger. I was doing a pretty good job of tossing off the Morelli incident. Maybe if I avoided it long enough it would go away permanently. Now, all I had to do was continue avoiding him.

The sun was setting fast by the time I pulled into my parking lot. I hauled all my bags into the elevator, and old Mrs. Bestler smiled at me. "Third floor," I panted, dropping them on the floor.

"Third floor, ladies' handbags, lingerie, and better dresses," she sang out, and I all but leapt out of the elevator. My heart had suddenly gone to racing at the thought that I was now completely unattached and would be seeing Ranger, for the first time guilt-free and alone. Omigod. I was going to have a flash. I did that stupid fanning motion to myself on the way to my door with my spare hand. It did nothing to stop the flash, but if I was going to be moronically female, I might as well go all out.

I unlocked my door and stuck my head in. "Anybody home?" I called. This wasn't really so strange, because people seemed to make it a habit of breaking into my apartment. This particular time, no one answered back. A good sign, but not convincing. I checked all my rooms and under my bed. Nothing. Now I was convinced.

The clock read five-ten in the afternoon. Eek! I had to get a move on. That was enough motivation for me. I took the world's fastest shower, dried my hair, gelled the crap out of it, and looked in the mirror. I had somehow managed nice wavy curls, rather than my usual out-of-control curls. Not exactly perfect hair, but for me it was a miracle. I decided to take it as a sign. Today was my lucky day. Maybe I wouldn't get shot at.

I almost chickened out on the garter belt and stockings. The stockings weren't so bad, but the belt made me feel- naughty. The fact that I was the only one who would even know it was there was a small comfort. Still, I was sticking to my guns. I pulled on the short skirt, and stood staring at the bag that held the very expensive red top. I could wear something else and it would look just as good. But then I wouldn't be trying out this new persona that I had created. No brave new Stephanie. Just old Stephanie, fraidy-cat and loser extraordinaire.

No, the top was staying, I told myself firmly. Stop being a chicken for one night. Just one night. You can do this.

I applied the last touches of mascara and stood back from the mirror. I always added liner when I was feeling self-conscious, and tonight I'd rimmed the top and the bottom. I'd done the whole nine yards. Lipstick, eyeshadow, foundation, and mascara. I didn't use blush because I was certain that fice minutes in Ranger's company, in this outfit, would do the trick just fine.

I stepped into the elevator at promptly six o'clock, and started at the sight of Ranger leaning against the far wall. His eyes traveled down the length of my body. I had compromised in the end, and thrown a black jacket over the red shirt. By the time I had to take it off we'd be in a dark bar, and that gave me a little confidence.

When he finally got back to my eyes, I noticed his had darkened to nothing but black pools. "I like the shoes," he said, and gave me a smile.

I was too nervous to smile back, so I just nodded. He grabbed my jacket sleeve and hauled me into the elevator, right up against him. "You need to be more aware of your surroundings, babe," he said, and kissed me, tongue and all. My toes curled in my shoes and my knees went limp. He caught me up around the waist and crushed me harder to him, slanting his mouth over mine. A flash of heat lit through my belly and I think I might have whimpered because he pulled back and set me on my own feet again.

The one time I didn't have to tell him to stop.

I put a hand to the wall to steady myself. "Wow," I said. "Could we repeat that later sometime?"

"Anytime, babe," he said, as the doors opened.

I managed to find my feet enough to get to his car. Tonight he'd chosen the Mercedes. Sleek, classy, and very black. Then I took in what he was wearing. SWAT black. The usual. He was all business tonight. Well, except for in the elevator. I started getting a hot flash just thinking about it.

He watched me slide in, and before I could stop it my skirt slid up, exposing the top of my thigh-high and the bit of belt holding it up. I almost had a heart attack trying to cover it back up. This got me the full on smile. "We have business later, babe," he said, and closed my door.

He wasn't talking about Vino Santinni, either. Oh boy.

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Ranger was his usual silent self on the drive over. I never could manage to slip into the Zone when I was driving. I had tried it a few times, but I had inherited too many Italian hand gestures from my father. It couldn't be done.

Ranger reached behind him into the seat, without taking his eyes off the road. He deposited a manila folder into my lap, the slight touch of his fingers on my thigh making me jump. The corners of his mouth tipped up again, and I had the sudden urge to stun gun him. Or grab him. I hadn't quite decided.

"Vino Santinni works for a very influential family in Jersey," Ranger volunteered. "He took something that doesn't belong to him, and they hired me to get it back."

I didn't bother asking what it was. I hadn't had any luck earlier, so why waste my breath? Instead I studied Vino's picture. He was a pudgy man, greasy-looking, not unlike my cousin Vinnie. His hair was slicked back to his head, and he wore an expensive suit that did nothing to hide the extra baby fat on him. At least it looked like baby fat. His face was round and scowling in this picture. "Is he dangerous?"

"Minimally, but I'm going to wire you just in case. It'll take us maybe fifteen minutes to get in and out, and you need to keep his attention as long as possible. My guess is he'll have a few goons around, but they'll be in plainclothes and won't bother you if you don't look dangerous."

I hadn't managed to stay focused much past the being wired part. Ranger's hands underneath my skimpy red top had me in heat.

"I don't suppose you have a gun," he said.

I shook my head, running a hand through my heavily gelled hair. "Couldn't find anyplace to put it," I said, and out of the corner of my eye I saw Ranger's grip on the steering wheel tighten a fraction.

When we pulled up in front of the Ritz, I sucked in a breath. The last distraction job I did for Ranger didn't go extremely well, but it had gotten done. I was a little apprehensive, but I needed the money. And I needed to keep busy.

Ranger picked up a little black box with a snap closure, which I now recognized as a standard box for wires. See, I was learning. No grass growing in my brain, nope.

He turned to me and smiled. "You're going to have to take your jacket off, babe," he said, ripping off four small pieces of tape.

Oh, crap. "I'm not sure that's a good idea," I said, taking my seat belt off. My plan had been _not_ to take the jacket off until he was well out of sight. Like Africa. Africa was good.

"Take it off." When I resisted, he reached out and in one lightning-fast motion had the jacket down at my waist, arms pinned to my sides with the heavy material. His eyes narrowed at the strips of bare flesh on each open side of the top, but he didn't say anything. He slipped the wire up beneath my shirt, and I forced myself not to squirm under the heat of his hands. Another second and it was secured with the pieces of tape, criss-crossed in two places.

"Thank you," I said, trying to keep my voice from cracking. He slipped his hands out of my shirt, and then suddenly around to my back. I yelped and tried to scoot backwards from him, but his hands were hot and held me effortlessly. He looked me in the eye and put the full force of his eye of the tiger directly on me. My courage was disintegrating, and my nipples were shrinking. I hadn't bothered with a bra because a) I couldn't exactly wear one with this shirt, and b) well, I wasn't exactly sure why. My brain had taken a vacation, and didn't seem like it was coming back anytime soon.

"Babe," Ranger said, his dark eyes liquid pools of black. He toyed with one of the ties on my shirt, and smiled at me. "Wear this for me?"

I jumped away from him. "Don't flatter yourself." Actually I sort of had, but he didn't need to know that.

"Vino should be at the bar. Just be yourself, and you'll do fine. I'll be listening. When it's time to go I'll get your attention."

He pulled my jacket back up over my shoulders, and kissed me. Softly, more of a brush of his lips than a real passionate kiss. "Be careful," he said, as I leapt out of the Mercedes and hit the sidewalk.

And he was gone. I saw a black SUV go past right behind him, and knew it must be Tank and the rest of Ranger's Merry Men. Off to make the world a better place. At least for the Mob.

I shuddered, and tried not to think about it as I stepped inside the hotel. The lobby was beautiful, all marbled floors and high ceilings. The lounge was directly off to my left so I stepped inside, letting my eyes adjust to the light.

Vino was sitting at the bar, just like Ranger had said he would be. I learned long ago that Ranger knew things only Batman could know. Or Superman. The fact that he maybe just did his homework was unacceptable to me. I preferred Batman.

I slipped up onto a barstool beside Vino and ordered a margarita, straight up. I made sure to cross my legs enough that the top of my stocking would show. Sure enough, just like every man on the planet, that got his attention. His baby-fat covered face all but went red, and I wondered if he had any women at all pay any attention to him.

"Dammit," I said, setting my drink down. "I just hate when this happens." Vino looked at me, and I smiled. "It's so hard to be a single woman anymore. It's all pantyhose and short skirts and lesbian sex."

His eyes bulged, and I laughed, my best sexy laugh. More of a throaty chuckle.

"Lesbian sex, huh?" he said, his eyes on my thigh as I pulled the skirt down to half-heartedly cover up the top of the stocking.

I shrugged. "Men seem to like that sort of thing." I batted my eyelashes at him. "Do you?"

He went a bit more red. "'Course you do," I said. I leaned in close and played with his tie a little bit. He was pretty repulsive up close, and his aftershave was going to gag me. "We only do that on Tuesdays, though. Thursday is my group sex night."

He choked on the drink he'd just taken a sip of. "Oh, darn," I said, grabbing up a napkin and dabbing at the drips on his suit that ran from his chest dangerously close to his crotch. I needed another drink. Now. "Sorry about that. Am I being too forward again?" I asked him, batting more of my eyelashes. I don't know why I did it. It just seemed the thing to do.

"No, not at all," he said, his voice going oily and making my skin crawl. I ordered another drink and looked around the bar, hoping to see Ranger waving me out of there. I looked at the clock above the bar, praying fervently. It had only been about five minutes. Dammit.

"So, do you want to dance?" I asked him, trailing my fingertip around the rim of my glass and licking the lime off my fingertip. His eyes bulged more and I wondered when they were going to pop out of his head and roll across the floor. That made me feel minimally better, so I smiled.

He hesitated, and I grabbed his hand. It was hot and sweaty. Eeew!!! I managed to calm my mental shrieking and tugged on him as I hopped off my stool. "We don't even really have to dance," I said in a tone that I hoped was suggestive. Playing the sex kitten wasn't exactly my best role. I played myself much better.

He got down from the bar after tossing back the last of his drink and let me lead him out on the dance floor. A fast song was playing, and I quickly realized he wasn't much of a dancer. For Crissakes. He grabbed my hips and started bumping and grinding with me, suddenly all hands and fingers. Before I could stop myself I pushed him away and forced a laugh. "Un-unh, sweety. Just because I have lesbians over and group sex doesn't mean I'm easy."

Great line, Stephanie, I told myself, doing a mental forehead slap. I was being paid to do this. Be a professional, dammit. I forced myself to smile like I was enjoying the dancing, trying to get into the rhythm of the song. Vino, however, didn't seem to be having any problems.

The song ended after what seemed like an eternity, and we returned to the bar. I downed another drink and ordered one more. I was starting to feel all tingly inside, and like maybe I could do this right. I took another sip.

"So," I said, "are you married?"

Vino shook his head, his double chin wobbling a little bit. "Hell no. I had me a broad once, but she disappeared. Still don't know what happened to her. Maybe she ran off with the mailman, you know what I mean?"

What disturbed me more was that I was pretty sure I did know what he meant. Mailman was definitely just a figure of speech. Yikes.

"I'm not married either. Men just don't give you space anymore, you know? Then the next thing you know they're in a bar air-humping another woman." I picked an ice cube out of my drink and sucked on it, flashing him a smile. "Now, you wouldn't treat a woman like that, would you?"

Vino turned his bulgy eyes on me and grinned. It did nothing for his face but give him yet another chin, and I tried to hide a laugh. This guy was sad. He didn't look dangerous at all. "I spoil my women," he said, and I almost choked on my drink. His women? This guy was unbelievable.

"Your women? How many do you have?" I asked, widening my eyes, trying to look impressed.

Vino popped the olive from his dirty martini into his mouth and licked his lips. "I got enough," he said. His voice was oddly deep. It didn't go with his image at all. He was like a big Jabba the Hut with bronchitis. Ick.

I glanced at the clock. Three minutes to go until Ranger should be out and done. This was taking an eternity. My only hope was that the paycheck was big.

"So," he said, as another fast song came on. "You wanna dance one more time?"

I mentally shuddered and forced a perky smile. "Sure!" I said, and downed the last of my drink. I tried to hop off my stool and my legs went wobbly. I would have gone down, but Vino caught me up next to him.

"Woops," he said. "Better be careful. You're going to need your legs under you." He waggled his eyebrows, and I found the ability to push away from him. I walked out onto the dance floor and found what I decided was the rhythm of the song. Funny thing was, I was all warm and fuzzy inside, and that got me thinking about Morelli. And Ranger. And how I wanted to feel sexy again. But maybe not right now. Right now I was having a hard enough time standing up in my FMPs. Maybe I should stop drinking. Three was enough for fifteen minutes. Or was it four? I couldn't remember.

Vino was getting a little turned on by the bumping and grinding, and I increased the distance between us a fraction. This guy was giving me the creeps.

From the corner of my eye I saw a very large man, dressed in a black pinstripe suit not unlike Vino's. He was coming towards us, and I knew this must be one of the goons Ranger had warned me about. Shit, I thought. He knows what's up.

Just then my cell phone rang. "Oops," I said to Vino. "Could you excuse me for a second? My phone…" He frowned, and I made me escape the lobby.

"I'm idling at the curb," Ranger said, his voice tight. And he disconnected.

My heart started pounding. My knees went a little more wobbly. Somehow I made it through the doors, and sure enough, Ranger's black Mercedes was sitting at the curb, purring at me. I was almost sure it was purring.

The door was flung open and Ranger looked out at me. "Get in. Now."

I managed somehow to get in the car. Something was wrong, I knew, even through my alcohol-induced happy fog.

Just as I was pulling my leg inside the car, Vino and his goon burst through the door. He looked me right in the eye, his before non-threatening eyes suddenly large and crazy, and I knew a moment of true fear. I slammed my door closed and Ranger roared out of the parking lot.

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	5. One Night

**Time Enough For Tears**

Chapter Five- One Night 

I leaned back in the seat and put my hand to my forehead. The great thing about alcohol is that feelings of fear and danger don't last long. "Whew," I said. "That was close."

Ranger glanced at me, and I got the almost smile. "Nice work, babe." He was quiet for a minute, and then he smiled again. "Lesbian sex?"

I shrugged and smiled too, a big, dopey, buzzy smile. "It sounded like the right thing to say."

He looked yummy, I decided. Edible. And he smelled good. Bulgari had become an aphrodisiac to me. The slightest whiff of it and I was thinking thoughts that were going to send me straight to hell.

I leaned over to sniff his arm, missed, and fell face first into his lap. Oh boy.

Ranger laughed and pushed me back up. "Babe, I'm driving."

I had nothing to say to that, so I just looked at him. He was nothing like Morelli, I decided. He was confident, and he never told me I needed a new job. Once he'd offered me his house in Maine, but I was pretty sure that was just because I was in so much danger. Of course, I was always in danger. It followed me like a black cloud. Morelli just ranted and raved and made out with Terry Gilman. The rat.

I must have said it out loud, even though I don't recall doing so, because Ranger grinned at me. I about wet my pants. "It's not the first time, Babe," he said softly, and I jerked my head up.

"Excuse me?" I wasn't sure I'd heard right. Not the first time? As in he'd been with Terry Gilman?

Ranger shook his head. "Morelli. I've had him watched a few times. This isn't the first time he's seen her."

Great, I thought, suddenly feeling tears well up. It was that time of the month, and now I'm learning that Morelli's been cheating on me already. "Why…why didn't you tell me?" I demanded, trying to blink the tears back into submission. Damn them, anyway.

Ranger shook his head. "Would you have believed me? Or would you have gotten mad and accused me of trying to steal you away." It wasn't a question. He knew that's what I would have done as surely as I knew it, too. I loved Morelli. I didn't want to believe he'd do something like that to me.

A tear slipped out of my eye and splashed onto the leather seat. "Shit," I said, and bent to rub it away. My happy fog was floating away, and I was all-too-quickly sobering back up. Nothing like a big blow to the heart to purify your blood-alcohol levels.

Ranger grabbed my hand. "It's okay, babe. We're almost there." His voice was soft and calming, and he didn't let go of my hand. The tender contact, so unassuming, had me undone.

And then the tears came. I sort of dissolved into them. Later I would be proud that I didn't resort to open-mouthed sobbing, sticking to more of a subdued whimper instead. Much more dignified, right? This was obviously the breakdown phase, and I was thinking maybe I could have Connie make some calls after all. No! No no no. Morelli didn't deserve that. He did, however, deserve the black eye I gave him, so I was satisfied.

What seemed like hours later, Ranger pulled into my parking lot and cut the engine. I looked at him, and dimly registered somewhere that I must look like hell. My mascara and liner had to be making tracks down my face, my nose was all red, and my face was splotchy with tears. Eeeuw…

Ranger angled out from behind the steering wheel and came around to my side. In one deft motion he scooped me out of the car and into his arms. His muscles were solid, and he seemed to have no problems carrying me to the elevator.

Mrs. Bestler saw me, saw Ranger, and her eyes widened. She punched in my floor number and wavered, "Shoes, handbags, and better underwear," still unsure whether I was okay or not.

Ranger smiled at her. "Bad day," he said, and Mrs. Bestler nodded.

At my door, Ranger set me on my feet and somehow opened my door. I didn't care. "Someday you're going to have to show me how you do that," I said, swaying a bit.

"Someday," he agreed, moving inside. He pulled a quick security check, and when he was satisfied it was safe pulled me in and locked the door behind me. I was being shoved toward my bathroom, and looked around at Ranger.

"Take a shower," he said. "I'll make some coffee."

It didn't seem like such a bad idea, and I didn't protest. I wanted to wash off the Vino germs on my body, and maybe, just maybe, I could wash away my hurt at Morelli too. Ranger was here. Ranger would make it okay. I don't know why I felt that way. I just did. Sort of like you can't see air but you know it's there because you're still alive? Yeah, maybe that was how Ranger was too. Keeping me alive.

I shed clothing as I went. Jacket first, then my shoes. I bent to undo my garter belt from my stockings and couldn't figure the damn thing out. I pulled at it, pushed at it, and finally whacked it with my fist. "Yow!" I said, rubbing my thigh where I'd just punched myself.

Ranger appeared in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. "Need help?" he asked, that amused smile floating over his face again.

I sent him my best PMS look ever and he just laughed at me, crossing the room in two strides and pushing me to sit down on the foot of my bed. "Nice touch, babe," he said, taking in the little strap of material that held the stockings to the belt. His hands didn't stop there, either. They moved to the zipper of my skirt and pulled it down, and I about wet myself. Lula had a point about this, and I made a mental note.

When he got around to the back, or lack of back, of my top, his eyes darkened. "Stand up."

Who was I to argue? Truth is, when Ranger's thisclose to me, there's not a whole lot I won't do if I'm told. He's really good when he's close up. A familiar tingle started down there and I almost told it to go away. Really. But then I stood up and his hands went to the ties, and I was all his. Morelli was history. I was alone, and I was hurting.

No. I wasn't alone. Ranger was here. Just like he always was when I needed him. If it didn't sound so dopey I'd say he's my knight in shining armor. But that sounds dopey, so I won't.

The shirt all but melted off of me, fluttering to the floor in a pile of red satin, and I was standing before him in nothing but the skirt, the stockings, and the garter belt. There was a moment of self-consciousness, and I tried to cover myself with my hands. Ranger wouldn't have it.

"No," he said, putting my hands at my side. "Don't." His voice was raw, and his mouth was tense. He pushed the skirt down around my hips and let it fall to the floor, followed closely by the garter belt.

He went to his knees in front of me, and I yelped. This got me a laugh. "Relax, babe. You still need a shower."

Gently, he slipped his fingers inside the top of my stocking and began rolling it down my leg. The slight touch tickled, my knees buckled, and I grabbed onto his shoulders for support. The next stocking followed closely, and then I was bare, naked as the day I was born, standing in front of probably the sexiest man on the planet. My nipples shrunk and hardened at the look in his eyes, and it wasn't lost on him either.

He shook his head and stood up. "Shower," he said, nudging me toward the door. "I'll be in the kitchen." When I hesitated he swatted me on the behind, and said, "Go. Now."

Again, I figured there was no point in arguing. I was feeling completely sober again, but the tingle hadn't gone away. I attributed that to the tall dark man in my kitchen. All his fault.

I stood under the hot spray until my skin threatened to turn pruney. Pruney was okay if you were alone, but it wasn't exactly sexy. Somehow I made my brain work enough to find a pair of the black boyshort underwear I bought today. I slipped them on, and then to cover that up I found a big t-shirt. Good enough. The sex kitten's job was over for the day. Now I could just be me. Hooray.

Ranger was standing at the counter when I walked in. "Feel better?" he asked, and I knew he wasn't talking about the alcohol.

I nodded. In some strange way crying seemed to have helped. I felt…better.

He picked up a mug and handed it to me, filled with steaming coffee. He was already drinking one.

"Want to watch a movie?" I asked suddenly, not knowing why. Okay, I was scared of him again. I needed Ghostbusters. Only they could combat the big, sexy presence in my apartment.

"Babe," he said, and reached for me. I leapt away just in time and covered it up by pulling out the tape.

"Ghostbusters," I said, my heart racing a million miles an hour. "Best movie on the planet. Seriously."

Ranger gave me a look that I couldn't quite decipher and sat down on the couch. He would wait. I knew this with a certainty I couldn't explain. Kind of like the air thing again.

When I sat down on the couch, I sat next to him this time, not on the opposite end like I'd done so many times before. He scared me, but not that much. I didn't even shriek when he put his arm around me and drew me close. My head fit perfectly into the hollow of his shoulder, and that was the last conscious thought I had.

I opened my eyes God knows how much later. The tv was off, and I was still leaning into Ranger's side. Eek! Suddenly, all I could think was _no underwear_!!!

"Babe," he said again, looking down at me with that amused face of his.

Something snapped inside me. I think that later I would identify it as pure animal lust. Tinged with something a little deeper that I didn't even want to try and qualify. Temporary insanity? Maybe. On the rebound? That too. Finally getting the opportunity to have a guilt-free Ranger-induced orgasm? Yes, please.

I pounced on him like a cat on a mouse, and it occurred to me that his lap really was quite comfortable. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him full on the lips.

Then I think at some point I became the mouse, because I was flat on my back on the couch, and Ranger's body was over me. Hot and hard, all muscle and passion. And there was desire. Oh, yes, there was desire.

He was kissing me like a starving man, and the things he was doing with his tongue made lightning spark down there, and suddenly I really wanted to sing the Hallelujah Chorus. Twice.

He stopped, and looked down at me, all squishy with desire. "Babe," he said, his voice surprisingly ragged. "Do you really want me? Or is this just a way of getting back at Morelli?"

I stared at him for a beat and really thought about it. "No," I said, shaking my head. Maybe I _had_ washed off some of the hurt Morelli had caused. He was in the past, and Ranger was my present. He was here, larger than life, and he wanted me. The real me, not some fragment of his imagination that he thought I could become. "I want you, Ranger. Not Morelli, not tonight, not ever. Just you."

I reached up and traced the outline of his jaw with my fingertips, and he lifted himself off me. "Where are you going?" Please God don't let it be away, I thought.

Ranger just smiled and gathered me into his arms. He kissed me again, hard this time, and I couldn't stop a wanton moan from escaping my lips. His mouth caught the sound, and I felt him laughing as he carried me into my room.

He lay me back on the bed, and I watched him. Bending to unlace his boots, they came off, followed by socks, his utility belt, his black t-shirt, and his watch. The black cargo pants came last. This time, my suspicions were confirmed. No underwear!

And then he was over me, and all around me. But it wasn't enough. "Ranger," I said, reaching for him. He pushed my hand away, and ran his own over the length of my body. His touch was reverent and gentle, as though he were paying worship at a temple. It rocked my world, and I gasped at the sight of his dark skin against mine, so pale in comparison.

His hand went further south, and the things he began doing with his fingers unraveled me like a bundle of yarn. And just like that, I went up in smoke. He laughed and nuzzled my neck, placing burning kisses on my flesh that caused my pelvic muscles to contract again. He kissed my collarbone, my breastbone, and paid equal attention to both my nipples, and suddenly I decided I had been a stupid woman for a very long time. If a man like Ranger could want me, really want me, anything was possible.

But his kisses continued. Down my ribcage, over my slightly pooched belly where he paused to dip his tongue into my navel, and down further before I could protest. As if I would. Down, headed straight for my- _Omigod_!!!

Before I even finished shaking from the onslaught he'd unleashed upon me, he was inside me. Hot and pulsing and filling every corner of me until I thought I would burst from the pleasurable torment. Bright lights flashed behind my closed eyelids, and I was sure that I was going to faint. Nothing else existed. All I could do was wrap my arms around him and hold on for dear life.

Ranger stopped moving abruptly, and gazed into my eyes. I was too stunned to say anything, except that I didn't want him to stop. I didn't say that, however, because he bent down and took my lips, in a way that was entirely not characteristic of Ranger's kisses. This was…well, this was just different.

He kept his eyes locked on mine, and he began to move again. My eyes wanted to drift closed, but Ranger kissed my neck and said, "Look at me." I couldn't say no to that, not with those black eyes seeing through to my soul the way they were. No words were necessary. He showed me with his actions and caresses that he cared for me, that he would keep me safe and never let anything happen to me. At least, that's what I wanted to believe, if only just for tonight. Tonight, I didn't want to be strong.

He gathered me close to him as we lay there in the dark, his breathing deep and even. One hand slowly stroked my back, the other nestled beneath his head. I took advantage of the moment and placed my hand over his heart. The strong, steady beating there assured me that Ranger must indeed be a mortal man. Almost.

"Please don't leave," I blurted out, and regretted it just as instantly. I clapped my hand over my mouth and sat up, gaping at him. All I got was a raised eyebrow and that bemused quirk of his lips. His eyes were still dark with passion.

"You want me to stay?" he asked. When I nodded, he studied me. "This means there will be a morning after, babe. Can you handle that?"

I thought about this for a moment. Then I nodded. If it turned out differently in the morning, well, I'd just have to think of something. It couldn't be _that_ awkward, could it? I mean, I've already slept in his bed, and this isn't the first time we've had sex.

I had a twinge at calling it sex. This hadn't just felt like sex. It felt like something entirely different. I pushed it back in my brain for later. I always thought having an orgasm was like a good shot of Valium. And this time I'd had three. Three! I shrieked in my brain. Morelli- No. I shut that off at the source. Morelli was done, and I was done with him. No more.

Ranger laughed out loud, and I looked at him, mouth open. "What?"

"Your ears are smoking, babe," he said, and pulled me back down next to him. His right arm went around my waist and pulled me in tight to his chest. The arm stayed where it was, and I was enveloped in the smell and feel of warm Ranger and Bulgari.

Yum.

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	6. Make You Mine

**Time Enough For Tears**

Chapter Six- Make You Mine 

Sunlight filtered in through my window, and I opened my eyes. It wasn't fully light out yet, and I wasn't alone in my bed. I remembered the job and the night before and was thankful I'd sobered up before going to bed. With Ranger. Yum, again.

He was lying next to me, one arm thrown over my waist, just as it had been when I'd gone to sleep. Protective and possessive. It looked like he was still sleeping. His hair was mussed and his features were relaxed. The profile I was getting made my toes curl. But then, he always made my toes curl. Sunlight framed his features in a halo that had me warming up in places he had never warmed up before. Oh, crap.

He was sexy when he was awake. When he was asleep he looked like a regular guy. Some of the years seemed to fade from his face. Even so, he still looked virile and dangerous.

"You could keep staring at me like that and I'm going to get ideas," he said, scaring the bejeebers out of me.

"Hey, I thought you were asleep," I said, propping myself on one elbow. He opened his eyes, and I got the amused smile again.

"You thought wrong. What time is it?"

I looked at the clock. "Five a.m. Why?"

"Just curious." Eyes still closed, he reached out and pulled me into him, and kissed me. My toes curled against his shins, and he laughed. When he finally released me, I was catching my breath. "Feeling awkward yet?" he asked, sitting up. The sheet fell low over his hips and this time I knew he wasn't wearing underwear.

I thought about it again. "No. Not today."

"Nervous?"

"Nope." And this time, I was telling the truth. It was even daylight and I wasn't nervous! This was a new development I'd have to deal with later. My brain wasn't able to process any kind of important information at the moment, thanks to Ranger, and I wasn't about to start complaining.

Ranger actually smiled this time. "Are you working today?"

"I work every day. See, when you suck at catching criminals as badly as I do, you have to work twice as hard to make up for your screw-ups."

"Babe," he said.

I blew out a sigh and snuggled up against him. He was warm and solid and welcoming, and when he slid his arm around me I knew nothing more than sweet oblivion.

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When I woke up the next time, full daylight was shining through my window. The bed felt surprisingly bigger, and I reached out. Nothing. The sheets were cool, so I figured he went out for a run.

I dragged myself to the shower and stood under the beating hot spray for what seemed like eternity. By the time I got out I was definitely borderline pruney. I found a pair of jeans and a black tank top, pulled some socks on, and padded out to the living room.

Ranger was already dressed, his hair still damp from the shower, and he was lacing up his boots. There was a steaming cup of coffee on the counter. "Is that for me?" I asked, pointing. There was a white bakery bag beside the cup. Knowing Ranger's diet I held out little hope for doughnuts. I wasn't entirely disappointed when I found a couple bagels and little packages of cream cheese.

"Yeah," he said, standing up. He walked toward me and searched my face, probably looking for some kind of nervousness. I wouldn't give him any. After last night I didn't feel it was necessary. He was still big and bad and dressed in black, but now I had a few insights that made him a little more human.

Then he kissed me. Tongue and all. My fingers curled into his t-shirt, and I think my knees buckled again, because his arms were around me, lifting me closer to him. "Oh, boy," I said when he sat me back down. "Okie dokey." I was such a dope. That was all I could think of to say? 'Okie dokey?' Unh. Mental forehead slap.

I yawned. "Now what time is it?"

Ranger had strapped his watch back on. "It's seven-thirty." His pager beeped and he read the face of it. "I have to go to work." He was almost to the door when he stopped, turned around, and came back to me. He took my face in his hand and looked me in the eyes. "Did Vino see you leave with me last night?" he asked.

"Yes. And one of his goons."

He closed his eyes for a minute, as though this was the first he'd thought of it. "I was afraid of that. I want you to be careful today. He's not going to be happy about what he lost last night."

"And what _did_ he lose last night?" I asked. It was hard not to get frustrated by all this mystery. But then, I figure that's what makes Ranger who he is, so I should try and go with it.

"I can't tell you that. The less you know the safer you are. If anybody asks, you left with your brother-in-law from the bar because your sister had a baby emergency."

"What? Do you think I'm in some kind of danger?" I asked him.

"What if I told you the object I took back from Santinni originally belonged to a very influential family, and that Santinni was going to sell this object to another very influential family."

"That would be bad," I said, catching on now. Ranger sometimes worked in the gray areas where official law enforcement couldn't go. I was pretty sure everything he did was still morally correct, even if it wasn't entirely legal. Mostly.

"Very bad. No one wants a crime war, babe. Not even the police."

I nodded. That was all I think I needed to hear.

He went to the door and I followed him. "You'll be careful," he said, grabbing my arm.

"I'll be careful," I said.

"Good. I'm putting a man on you today. Try not to break him," he said.

And he was gone.

"Arrogant ass," I said to the door.

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I went back into the bathroom, put some gel in my hair and a little mascara. There. I was ready for work. Unfortunately, no one else probably was. So I put on my big boots, laced them up, and went into the kitchen after my coffee and bagels. Ranger hadn't brought me twigs for breakfast, at least. I mean, it wasn't exactly doughnuts, but the thought was there.

I dropped a small hunk of cream-cheesed bagel into Rex's cage. He scurried out of his soup can and twitched his whiskers at me. His little black eyes blinked as they adjusted to the light. "Morning," I said. Rex stuffed the bagel into his cheek pouch and hunkered back into his can. Another meaningful pet-owner interaction.

As I was finishing up my coffee the phone rang. I wasn't in the mood to answer. Besides, it could be Joe. And I wasn't ready to talk to Joe. Not yet. Ranger's smell was all over me and around me, and I didn't want to burst my little euphoric bubble. The last night I spent with Ranger I only got about four words out of him before he left. _This_ was something else entirely.

The phone continued to ring. I continued to pretend I wasn't home. The machine picked up after what felt like years.

"It's me." It was Joe. "Look, Steph, we need to talk. I'm…I'm sorry." There was big frustrated sigh on his end. "Call me. Please." And he hung up.

It was my turn to blow out a big frustrated sigh. This was my life, the made-for-tv movie with a low budget. Well, maybe not Ranger. Ranger was _definitely_ not low budget. He was The Rock and Vin Diesel and Antonio Banderas all rolled up in one edible package wrapped in black SWAT clothes.

I still found that thinking about Ranger got me all hot and frustrated, even after last night. Only now I had lots of pictures and touches and memories to see me through many long winters. And thinking about Morelli still got me sad.

Maybe I should call him back, I thought. But not right now. Right now I was still in a state where maybe talking to him wasn't the best idea. Okay, that was a lame excuse. I really _was_ hiding from him, running away like I always did. At least this time I didn't run him over with a Buick. That didn't mean I wasn't tempted to do so.

Ranger was safer territory at the moment. The first time we were together, it hadn't been exactly wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am, but it _had_ been tense. At least for me. Not that Ranger hadn't been wonderful. He'd been amazing. But in contrast to last night it had been a finger snap. Last night he'd been amazing, but tender in a way I hadn't thought it possible for him to be. It rattled me. Ranger told me there were no emotions involved in our relationship. That his lifestyle didn't lend itself to relationships _at all_. So what was this all about?

I was seriously plunged into some deep self-reflection, and it weirded me out. I needed something sweeter than a damn bagel. I needed doughnuts. Or Tastykakes. I'd had too much of Ranger's "my body is my temple." Well, at least I'd had enough of the 'temple' that my own body was feeling a few hundred calories short of impurities in my system.

That settled it. I grabbed my keys and headed for the door.

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	7. Summer Sunshine

Chapter Seven- Summer Sunshine 

I grabbed a bag full of doughnuts and a coffee on the way to the office, and cranked up Godsmack to try and avoid anymore deep thinking. Godsmack has that effect, I suppose. Traffic was a pain in the ass, and though my apartment was extremely close, it took me five minutes longer to get there than usual. I released my stress by making Italian hand gestures and banging my head on the steering wheel. I now had a headache, but I felt somewhat better.

I decided today would be a good day to pick up Donna Pogue. The file listed her address as a place in Point Pleasant, a good distance away from Trenton. Lula would probably ride shotgun, having taken up an unofficial partner status. Since Benito Ramirez had beaten her and left her tied on my fire escape, and I had gotten her down and into my apartment, Lula has changed her ways. Maybe not her wardrobe, but she was a step in the right direction. And as much as I hated to admit it, she and Connie were fast becoming my friends and allies.

Said friends both jerked their heads up when I breezed through the door. "Omigod," Connie said. "I smell powdered sugar Dunkin' Donuts."

I held the bag aloft and then plopped it down on her desk.

"Whew," Lula said, demolishing a Boston cream. "I was about to waste away."

I looked at the clock and back at Lula. "You're on time," I said. It wasn't really a question or a statement. More of a mild exclamation.

Lula shrugged and sucked some of the filling off her index finger. "Had a fight with my old man. Threw his ass to the curb."

My eyes widened. I'd never seen Lula's 'old man,' but apparently she really did have one. Wow.

"It's alright though," she said, smoothing out her stretchy animal-print top. "I figure I'll go after a piece of that hunk of love that's always tailing your ass."

"Tank?"

"Yeah," Lula said, licking her lips. "I could definitely have a piece of that muscle-bound brother."

We all thought about this for a minute. Connie and Lula fanned themselves.

"And he goes commando," Lula said.

"He just said he doesn't wear tighty-whiteys," I pointed out.

"Don't matter. I can tell. He goes commando."

Well, maybe it was a job requirement, I thought. You had to go commando, because….what? Maybe so when they shove their guns in their pants they don't get caught in the underwear band? Hmm. This I would have to think about later.

"I'm going after Donna Pogue today," I said, polishing off my second doughnut. "I'm going to Point Pleasant to check out her house. She's probably home. If not, I'll try her at work."

Lula stood up and accidentally shoved a stack of files in a drawer. She nudged it shut with her hip and grabbed her purse. "Well, as it happens I just finished me a bunch of that filing. I figure the rest can wait. I'm going with you."

There was no sense arguing. It was an exercise in futility. But hey, that was my specialty. Behind her desk Connie rolled her eyes, knowing the same thing.

When we got outside, there was a big black SUV idling curbside. The windows were tinted and I couldn't see who it was. It had been at least a few weeks since I'd put any of Ranger's men in the hospital, so that didn't narrow it down much.

"I bet that's Tank in there," Lula said. "I think maybe I won't talk to him. I still can't explain the bacon," she said, shouldering a fluorescent pink leather purse. I tried not to laugh at the extra swing she put in her walk on the way out.

The window on the SUV rolled down a fraction. I had a glimpse of black sunglasses and behind them, Tank's face. There was another shadow in the passenger seat, so he had a partner today. Probably Cal. I waved and he nodded at me, and the window went back up. Lula fanned herself. "That man is hot."

"We'll take my car," I said, opening the door. Lula climbed in the other side and we were off, on our way to Point Pleasant to make the world a safer place. It was a much nicer day than it had been yesterday. The sun even managed to peek periodically from behind the clouds, and there were bits of blue sky in between.

I felt safer knowing Tank was on my tail. That meant that if anything went wrong I'd have back-up. Not that Lula wasn't back-up, but Tank was a professional. Sure, he didn't ever say much, and I had no idea what he thought about baby-sitting me _again_, but there it was. I'm pretty much a coward at heart.

It was a pretty uneventful drive, as drives go. We swung into a McDonald's halfway there and bought burgers, fries, and big Cokes. Meal of champions. Real nutrition. There were vegetables in the fries, meat (I'm pretty sure) in the burgers, and wheat in the buns. All in all, a balanced meal.

We arrived in Point Pleasant to much nicer weather. Here, the sun was shining its happy face out of a blue sky. I almost expected blue birds to start flying around and twittering. Unh. "We need to find Lark Street," I told Lula, "so keep your eyes open."

"Sure. You bet. I'm a human compass."

Twenty minutes later we were still lost. "Dammit," I said, whipping off the road and slamming the car into park. Tank pulled to a stop behind me and I stalked back to his window, knocking on it.

It rolled down, and Tank looked out at me. Hal was riding shotgun. Well, I was close anyway. "Do you know where Lark Street is?" I asked, shoving errant brown curls out of my face.

Tank nodded, and I swear he was trying not to smile. "Two blocks down, make a right, go another block. The house is blue, on the right hand side."

I gaped at him, wondering why he hadn't just told me that in the damn first place. "Thanks," I said, doing my best at stinging sarcasm. I think I managed pretty decently. Tank just nodded and the window went back up.

I was muttering by the time I slammed my way back inside the car. Lula looked at me and laughed. "He knew where it was all the time, didn't he?"

"Shut up," I said, and screeched out of the parking lot. Donna Pogue's house was exactly where Tank said it would be, and I wondered just how long they'd been laughing about my lack of direction.

There was a tan Buick in the driveway and I could see flashes from a tv screen just inside the window. Donna Pogue was in residence today. Lucky me. If I kept this lucky streak up, maybe all the cops at Trenton P.D. would stop making pools and bets on me. Okay, not likely, but miracles happen every day, right?

"Come on," I said, hoisting my pocketbook over my shoulder. I didn't bother locking the doors. Ranger's men weren't going to let anything happen to the car. Unless it got blown up. And that almost never happens. Almost.

"I got my Glock in case we have to bust a cap in her ass," Lula said, petting her purse.

"No! No no no. No shooting. We're just going to calmly tell her she needs to come to the station with us. Okay?"

"Hunh," Lula said, kicking at a rock on the sidewalk.

"You go around back and watch the screen door. If she comes through," I said, smiling. "Sit on her or something."

"Yeah," Lula said, smiling. "I could squash her skinny ass like a bug." She looked back at the SUV containing Tank and Hal, and smiled. There was no movement from within, but she looked satisfied with herself. The extra swing was still in her walk as she went around back.

It came to me all of a sudden that maybe Lula and Tank would be a really interesting couple. Okay, _really_ interesting. Tank never said anything, and Lula never shut up. Tank was quiet and seemed to make carefully thought-out decisions. Lula busted doors down on the wrong houses. Oh, Lord, please don't let them have children, I thought, moving up to the porch.

I knocked lightly on the screen door, and Donna answered the door. "Omigod!" she said. "You're that bounty hunter! The one that burned down the funeral home."

"It wasn't my fault!" I said, shoving a bit of hair behind my ear.

Donna was beaming. "This is so cool. Are you here to take me to jail?"

"Um, yes." Somehow I couldn't picture this Donna blowing up her ex-boyfriend's car.

"Wow," she said, picking up her purse from a table near the door. "I can't believe I actually get to meet you. You're my hero!" she said, still beaming.

I didn't know what to say to that. I'd never been anyone's hero before. I was usually the one people were being hero's _for_.

Lula stomped around the house, huffing. "The one day I'm all ready to rumble, and they don't even run," she grumbled. She got into the car as I opened the back door for Donna, and we all got in.

When we were en route back home, I looked in the mirror at Donna. "So why did you blow up your ex's car?"

She rolled her eyes, and I couldn't help thinking that she reminded me a little of myself. Without the irritating perkiness. She pulled an emery board from her purse and filed a stray corner off an otherwise perfectly manicured hand. "I caught him in the stadium with Jenna Strakowski, doing the full-on horizontal mambo. He was supposed to be meeting _me_ there, but no, he was with Jenna and her perfect boobs. He deserved to have his car blown up."

We all thought about that for a moment. None of us could say we wouldn't have done the same in her shoes. I'd given Morelli a black eye. That was pretty close to blowing up his car, but I'd already done that months ago. For different reasons of course, but blown it up, nonetheless. It gave me an inner satisfaction.

"Then why didn't you get your skinny white ass to court?" Lula grumped, still unhappy about not being able to tackle someone.

Donna resumed the beaming, and I hid a grimace. All this high-school perkiness was eating at my stomach. "Well, I was hoping to meet Stephanie, of course!" she said.

The car went silent.

"Run that by me again?" I asked, incredulous.

"I wanted to meet you! All my girlfriends and I are big fans. You're like, the most famous girl at Trenton High!"

Omigod. I pinched myself to make sure I was still awake.

Donna, unfazed, continued. "People are always talking about you. I think someone actually did a research paper on the probability of one person having all those cars blown up. It was wicked. That's the whole reason I went to Vinnie to get bonded out. I just knew I'd get to meet you, and then I could tell all the girls about it!"

I think she may have taken a breath, then, but couldn't be sure.

"And when you burned down that funeral home with your grandma? Oh, I would have _loved_ to have seen that!" This was almost a squeal, and Lula and I couldn't take it anymore.

"Who likes Godsmack?" I asked, as I turned the volume up.

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Donna was still beaming when I left her at the station. I had taken my car keys in with me so she couldn't leave me stranded again. This was all too weird. I had a fan club at Trenton High? Now _that_ was something to think about. I got a nauseous lump in my stomach. Or not.

When I got back to my car, I noticed a strange lack of Lula. Slamming the door, I stalked back to Tank and banged on the window. "Where's Lula?" I demanded

Tank smiled at me over the tops of his sunglasses. "Called a cab. She flashed me."

I stuttered. "She _what_!!!" Please God let it have been an accident.

Tank just smiled. My cell phone rang and I barked "What!" into the receiver, knowing it was going to be Lula.

"Oh," I said, blushing to the roots of my hair. "Hi, mom."

Tank and Hal burst out laughing. I scowled at them and slunk back to my car.

"We're having pot roast tonight," my mother said. "And pineapple upside-down cake for dessert."

Sold. Hell nor high water could keep me from pineapple upside-down cake. It was ambrosia. Besides, this was the first accident-free day I'd had in a long time. I could use that to strengthen the case for my job. The fact that I liked it. Okay, most of the time I liked it. When people weren't stalking me, or shooting at me, or throwing bombs into my car.

I drove to Vinnie's office and got my check from Connie. Lula was sitting there, looking innocent. The door to Vinnie's inner sanctum burst open.

"This is fabulous!" he said, looking all excited. Probably had a nooner with a goat. "You're bringing me business!"

I hung my head. "I guess Lula already told you, hunh?" I cut a look at Lula, who tried to look innocent.

"What?" she asked, for the first time bending to do some real filing.

"You keep this up, I'm going to give you a raise," Vinnie said, slamming the door. My first thought was that he was ill. Then the bolt finally slid into place and we all heaved a sigh of relief.

"This has been a weird day," I said, handing the paperwork over.

"I heard."

"Well, I'm going home for the day," I announced. "Mom's making pineapple upside-down cake."

They looked hurt that I wasn't inviting them, so I made a hasty retreat.

Tank and Hal followed me to my apartment building, and the window went down again. "Thanks for the back-up," I said. "I'm tucked in for the night." Okay, it was a fib. But I was going to my parents' house for cripes sake. It was five minutes away! There were no unusual cars in my parking lot, and I had a happy feeling of safety in my stomach.

Tank nodded, and picked up his cell phone. Probably dialing Ranger to let him know I was home safely. Then he got out of the car and followed me up to my apartment. This was standard procedure anymore. One of the Merry Men does a sweep of my apartment for dead things, crawly things, and cranky things, and then he leaves. It was like clockwork.

Gun in hand, Tank took the key from me and swung the door open. There was a slight pop, and two darts with a little line between them embedded themselves in Tank's chest. He went down like a sack of sand and twitched on the hallway floor. I turned to run, but a massive hand grabbed the scruff of my neck and hauled me inside. Tank was out like a light, still twitching. Remotely I realized it was some sort of stun gun, only when the darts were in you could keep shocking the person. Another man in the corner held some kind of control, and he pushed the button again and again, an evil grin splitting his face.

I was thrown to the floor in the entryway, right in front of a pair of very expensive loafers. I followed them up a pair of expensive trousers, then to an expensive jacket, and finally to the baby-fat face of Vino Santinni.

"Ms. Plum," he said, his eyes buggy and scary like they'd been when I left the hotel. He held his hand out, and when I didn't take it he grabbed me and pulled me into a standing position. "I want it back," he said, his deep Jabba voice a little more than enough to creep me out.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I said. "Want what back?"

_Wham_. A fist connected with my gut, and I went to the floor, clutching my stomach. I couldn't get my breath fast enough, all the wind knocked out of me.

"I saw you leave with the dark man, Ms. Plum," he said, the deep voice condescending now, like you would speak to a child with their hand in the cookie jar trying to prove their innocence. "I want it back."

I choked on the gulps of air I was sucking in. "I don't have it. I don't know where it is or what you're talking about." The scary part was, that was the truth. I really didn't know what Ranger had taken from this man, or what he'd done with it. That put me in a really bad place.

Vino shook his head and sighed. "Then I'm going to leave a message for your friend that I want it back."

"Sure," I said, standing up on wobbly legs. "Let me get a piece of paper and a pen, and I'll gladly give him the note."

The evil smile widened on the goon holding the controller. He pushed the button a few more times and set it down. Tank was out cold on the floor, his body still jerking every few seconds. "Tie him up," Vino snarled, and the goon quickly did as he was told.

The other man was close behind me, but in my panicked state I didn't hear him until he grabbed my arms behind my back. A roll of duct tape was tightly wound about my wrists, and I started to struggle. _Wham_. Another punch, right to the gut. I groaned, and would have fallen, but the pressure on my arms was painful.

Vino smiled as Tank's arms and legs were cuffed and shackled. They used metal cuffs, not tape, taking no chances. The shocks would wear off soon, and he would be angry. Better to be safe.

The man shoved me back down on the ground and rolled his cuffs up. The smirk on his face scared me more than Vino's buggy eyes did. I knew what was coming. Vino's note to Ranger was going to be me. So much for my happy feeling of safety.

Vino nodded at the men, and sat down on my couch. The two goons closed in on me, and I struggled to get up off the floor, run away, anything. I had no luck.

The first punch hit me in the jaw, and I tasted blood in my mouth. The second caught my right cheekbone and little lights twinkled behind my eyelids. And they just kept hitting me. I tried to curl in on myself to protect my face and head, but to no avail. That just made them angry. They lashed out with their boots, and I began to scream. I'd never felt such pain in so many places all at once.

Then a boot made contact with my forehead, and everything faded out, and just as suddenly came back into focus. There was something warm in my right eye, and I couldn't see out if it. I think I must have been groaning or crying or something, because there was an awful keening in the room. The pain was kind of distant now, even though I felt the impact of every blow.

I managed to roll over on my side, the men still kicking and punching at me, and saw Tank. His eyes were open and bulging, and he was struggling at the cuffs and shackles on his legs. There was rage in his eyes, and it was pretty scary.

The door to my apartment burst open, and everyone stopped moving. Ranger stood there in the doorway, like an avenging black angel. He looked down at me, on the floor between the two men, and a muscle jumped in his jaw. Then he had his gun in his hand, and three shots were fired. I heard two thumps, and a large body crashed on top of me. I cried out, and everything faded to black…


	8. The Hardest Day

Time Enough For Tears Chapter Eight- The Hardest Day 

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"**The Hardest Day"- by The Corrs**

One more day, one last look  
Before I leave it all behind  
And play the role that's meant for us  
That said we'd say goodbye

One more night by your side  
Where our dreams collide  
And all we have is everything  
And there's no pain there's no hurt  
There's no wrong it's all right

If I promise to believe will you believe  
That there's nowhere that we'd rather be  
Nowhere describes where we are  
I've no choice, I love you  
Leave, love, you wave goodbye

And all I ever wanted was to stay  
And nothing in this world's gonna change

Never wanna wake up from this night  
Never wanna leave this moment  
Waiting for you only, only you  
Never gonna forget every single thing you do  
When loving you is my finest hour  
Leaving you, the hardest day of my life  
The hardest day of my life

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Chapter Eight- The Hardest Day 

Slowly, my vision swam back into focus. There were voices all around me. Too many people in my apartment. At least, I thought I was in my apartment. I chanced a look around. Dimly I realized I could see out of my right eye now. There was hell behind my eyelids. My body was on fire. Everything hurt, and it was extremely hard to turn my head more than a fraction of an inch any one direction.

I was wrapped in the fluffy quilt from my bed, on my couch. Someone must have put me there, because the last I remembered I was on the floor.

I saw Ranger standing across the room, talking to Eddie Gazarra. Tank was talking to Eddie's partner, Big Dog. I struggled to sit up, and pain exploded through my body. I felt weak all of a sudden, and thought better of it. Maybe laying down was okay after all. I did a semi-conscious check of my body. Nothing _felt_ broken. That would be miraculous after those steel-toed boots. Later I would attribute it to the bone-strengthening calcium of Tastykakes. But for now, I was content to close my eyes and float along.

I got the whirlies and opened my eyes again. Ranger looked over at me and said something to Eddie before crossing the room. I couldn't think of anything to say, so I just looked at him. He reached out and tucked a curl behind my ear, trailing his finger along my chin. "Babe," he said.

He might have said more, but I don't remember. I slid back into unconsciousness once more.

When next I awoke it was to subdued light. I was in some sort of vehicle. An ambulance, because there was a paramedic crouched over me, holding an iv bag. Ranger sat on my left, and on my right was Morelli. He must have gotten a phone call from one of the police officers.

"Hey, Cupcake," Morelli said.

They were both looking at me. Both attempted a smile, but neither was very successful. I must really look bad, I thought, and passed out again.

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Sunlight cast a dappled pattern on my bed. I blinked my eyes a few times and stared at the ceiling. Stark white. Extremely clean. No cobwebs. I was definitely not in my apartment. I thought maybe I could sit up, but I remembered sharp pains from the last time and decided not to. My whole body still ached, but everything was a little fuzzy. I was probably on some kind of pain medication.

A brilliant idea hit me. I was in a hospital. Hospitals have those neat up-down beds. And there was usually a remote… Aha! I found it, and pushed a button without craning my neck around to look at it. The tv came on. Shit. I pushed that button again and the tv went off. I pushed another button, and the bed tilted upwards a few degrees.

I started at the sight of Ranger sitting in a chair beside the bed. He looked like the same old Ranger, but there was a tiredness about him. No big circles under his eyes, but his face was a bit drawn, and his t-shirt was a little rumpled. It didn't look like it was a fresh one. Maybe he hadn't been home yet. He was looking at me like he was mildly surprised that I was awake.

"Yo," I said, my voice croaky. This got me a small smile.

"Yo, yourself," he said, mimicking my usual response to him. I finally got to say 'yo' first. Yay for me.

"How long have I been out?" I stifled a yawn and it hurt my head.

Ranger looked at his watch. "About thirty-seven hours," he said. "They moved you out of ICU about five hours ago." He stood up, grabbed a tray to his right and pushed it close to the bed. "Thirsty?"

My tongue was stuck to the roof of my mouth and I sounded like Kermit the Frog with strep throat. I nodded.

He grabbed a little pink pitcher and poured some water into a glass. A straw was already tucked in it. I struggled to sit up, but I was pretty woozy, so I slunk back down in the warm bed. Ranger shook his head with a smile, and held the straw to my lips.

The first sip was instantly absorbed by my mouth and parched throat. I sucked down three more before he took the straw away. "Easy, babe," he said, setting the glass back down. "You don't want too much on your stomach at once."

"You saved me," I pointed out. My voice was soft. I had a room to myself but I didn't want to take chances. "You killed them, didn't you?"

Ranger was silent. He just looked at me with those dark mysterious eyes.

"Thank you," I said, not knowing what exactly was appropriate to say to someone who bloodied their hands for you. This was the second time Ranger had killed someone to protect me. Right now Eddie Abruzzi seemed years ago.

Ranger nodded, once, almost imperceptibly. Just enough to let me know that it was okay, and that I was okay. It was more than I expected.

Feeling a little better, I watched him. Maybe it was the pain drugs that made me ask stupid questions. That was my best explanation.

"Where's Joe?" I didn't see him anywhere around, but I remembered him being in the ambulance.

"He had to stay at the station for a while. Fill some paperwork out. Work out a few glitches." I knew what those glitches were. Someday I would try to understand the strange working dynamic between Morelli and Ranger. There was definitely rivalry there, but it seemed that they could put all that aside and work as a team. At least, when I was involved. Which was often. Argh.

I took a moment to take stock of myself. I was in one of those little gowns that your butt hangs out of. My arms were solid bruises, icky purple and black ones. My lip was swollen and painful. Likely a cut there. My forehead burned, and I raised my hand to it. Bandaged. Wonderful. Probably got split open when that steel-toed boot made contact with it. I knew a moment of sheer euphoria when I saw there were no casts on me.

"It was mostly internal stuff they were worried about," Ranger said, still watching me. "Internal bleeding, spinal cord damage, concussion. They didn't hit your head more than the one time, so you didn't have a concussion. For a while, they thought you might have gone into a coma." His voice was extremely tight, and I chanced a look at his face.

Stony. Not giving anything away. He stopped speaking after that. I didn't want to guess why.

"I'm sorry," I said.

His head jerked up. "What?"

I cleared my throat a little. "I said, I'm sorry."

Ranger shook his head, smiling. "This time it really wasn't your fault, babe." He rubbed his forehead and his pager beeped. He glanced at the read-out and cleared it. I didn't bother asking.

"How's Tank?"

Ranger grinned. "Pissed off. And embarrassed. Thought I was going to kill him, too, for getting taken by surprise like that." His expression darkened considerably. "And for letting them get to you."

I was speechless. This was an undercurrent of something. I detected serious amounts of what could possibly have been worry and care all wrapped up in one quiet little statement. Damn Morphine, anyway.

"But I'm okay," I said, trying to sound perky. But I really wasn't. I was terrified, even now, in this hospital. Likely, it would pass with the pain from the injuries, but at the moment I didn't want to be alone. I had been violated, and beaten, and I was tired.

Ranger shook his head. "Liar." He gestured to a bag in the corner. "I went back to your apartment last night and got clothes for you, and other stuff I thought you might need. They're going to keep you at least tonight to make sure you're okay."

I didn't want to be in the hospital another night. But then, I really didn't want to go back to my apartment, either.

"A cleaning crew went through your apartment this morning. The place is squeaky. You'll need to go down to the station in the next few days and make your statement. Or I can have them come here," he said.

I sighed. This was the part I hated most. "Have them come here. My mom will have a plotz when she finds out about this."

A corner of his mouth quirked. "She already knows."

I groaned. Please, no.

Ranger went on. "Morelli and I have been keeping them updated. The hospital isn't allowing you visitors."

"Then how did _you_ get in here?" I asked, attempting to narrow my eyes again. Pain sliced through my right eye and I winced. Ranger caught it, too.

He just smiled.

"Fine," I huffed. "By mysterious. I'm only in a hospital bed, after all. I mean, I could have _died_, but no, don't tell me--"

Ranger was out of his chair and over me in an instant. I stiffened instinctively, but he just took my hand, very gently. "Don't ever say that, babe," he said, his eyes extremely dark. We looked at each other for a few minutes, and then I looked down at my hand in his. This man had saved my life twice now.

My eyes filled, and before I could blink them back tears spilled down my cheeks. I was a mess, a whiny mess, and just now I didn't care. I wanted to feel safe, and I wanted to be the one without the problems and the scary life.

Ranger tipped my chin up when I tried to turn my head away. I looked at him through wide, wounded eyes, not caring if I looked like a weak sissy. I think I earned it. "Think of a happy memory," he said suddenly, and I blinked at him.

"Close your eyes, and think of a happy memory," he repeated. Okay, I could do that.

"Got one," I said, focusing on it.

"Now put yourself there. Concentrate on what you feel, and what you see, and what you hear."

I smiled. Shit, now I was getting turned on. My emotions were completely out of whack. But I felt better. "Wow," I said, opening my eyes. "That really works."

Ranger just stood there. I wondered if he wondered what my memory had been. Well, I wasn't telling.

"Do you want me to call Morelli?" he asked.

I shook my head. "I don't want to see him right now."

"He's worried about you."

"Yeah, well, join the club," I said. I couldn't face Morelli now, not like this. And now I needed to go to the bathroom. Indignity upon indignity. But I wasn't hooked up to an IV, so that would make things easier. At least my room had a private bathroom. "Um, do you think you could turn around?" I really didn't relish the idea of mooning him all the way across the room.

"Be careful when you stand up," he said, turning his back. "You've been laying down for a while. Might want to sit up first."

Good point. So I tried to sit up. Little bells clanged in my head and dots danced in front of my eyes. I grabbed onto the rail for support and closed my eyes until the commotion went away. When I opened them again Ranger was standing beside the bed. I raised my eyebrow at him, but that hurt too so I put it back down.

"Nothing I haven't seen before, babe."

"Well, you don't have to look so damn smug about it," I snapped. Okay, so he really didn't look that smug. I hated being vulnerable. Unacceptable.

Ranger dropped the railing on the side of the bed and stepped back.

I put one foot, then another, on the cool floor. I was wearing socks. Someone must have put them on me. Gingerly, I tested the weight on my bones and found that, at least, didn't hurt too bad. However, when I tried to stand all the way up, my vision tunneled and then went black. Ranger caught me on the way down, and lifted me easily.

Next thing I know he deposited me on the toilet seat. "This is so not dignified," I said, frowning. My cheeks were flaming, and my heart was in danger of bouncing out of my chest and running far, far away. My mother was right. I was a trial. I also figured that when Lula and Connie asked about my hospital visit, I would leave this little piece of information _out_. Permanently. I may even forget about it. Like right now.

Ranger grinned at me and closed the door. I flushed the toilet and looked in the mirror. _Yikes_. This was not sex-kitten hair, that was for sure. My left eye was black, and my forehead was swollen above my right eye. It had been split open, just as I'd thought. I sighed, and managed to wash my hands before he opened the door again. This time I had my feet under me a little more than before, and with some assistance managed to walk across the room under my own steam. Boy, getting the crap beat out of you really does a number on your energy reserves, I thought.

The door opened and a short round nurse bustled in. I don't know why, but nurses _always_ bustle. They always have brillo pad hair and no ankles, and they bustle. Since I was a kid and had to go to the doctor after I jumped off the roof trying to fly, I've had this theory.

This particular nurse was a lot nicer than that last one, however. She smiled at me up and walking around. "You gave us a fright, young lady. Weren't sure you were going to wake up." She came right up to my face and stuck a thermometer in my mouth. I looked to Ranger for help, but he shrugged and held his hands palm-up in a helpless gesture.

The round woman kept bustling around me, looking at my bruises. She nudged me into a chair and peeled the bandage off my forehead. Her tongue clucked and I winced. Now she was reminding me of my mother. Holy crap. "It's good that you're up and walking around, then," she said, pulling the thermometer out. "Ah, normal. That's a good sign, too, miss." She glanced at Ranger and blushed to the roots of her hair.

"That's a fine gentleman you've got yourself there, young lady. He never left your side, not once, even while you were in ICU." I gaped at Ranger, but his expression didn't change. Oblivious, the nurse continued. "'Course, we don't usually let visitors into ICU when a patient's in that condition, but he was very insistent."

She stopped and gave me a sympathetic look. "But after what you went through it was a small thing to ask." Her eyes glanced over my arms and lingered on my black eye. Then she tut-tutted again and refilled my water pitcher. "You'll stay here again tonight, just for observation, and if all goes well, we'll release you in the morning," she said, smiled at me again, and bustled out the door.

"They always bustle," I murmured, and heard Ranger chuckle. I was lingering on the vision I had of Ranger, staying by my side for thirty-seven straight hours. That was…I didn't know. It was something, though. Maybe the pain drugs again.

"Maybe you should lay down again," he said. "You're looking a little tired."

I shook my head. "No. The more I stand up the better I feel. My legs are almost working again." It was hard to walk around much, though. I couldn't turn my back on Ranger because of the stupid gown.

"I brought a big t-shirt and a pair of your boxers that I found," Ranger said, retrieving my duffel bag from the floor.

"How do you do that?"

He looked at me, blank-faced. "Read my mind. All the time."

That got me the smile. "I could tell you…"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you'd have to kill me," I said, taking the clothes he offered me. I stopped. "I miss Rex," I said. "No one's taking care of Rex. He's all alone in my apartment."

I think I looked like I might bolt, because Ranger put his hand on my shoulder. "It's okay," he said, and when I began to breathe normally he reached around the privacy curtain they used for exams. He pulled out Rex's little aquarium, and I think I might have squealed.

Ranger set the aquarium on the rolling tray and shook his head at me.

Rex rushed out of his soup can, black eyes flicking this way and that. His whiskers twitched a million miles an hour. "Poor Rex," I said.

I looked over to find Ranger giving me that look. The 'oh you sad woman' look. "What?" I demanded. "I'm his mother. He needs me." To which Rex hunkered back down into his soup can and went promptly to sleep.

"Stupid hamster anyway," I grumbled.

Ranger laughed out loud.

The door opened again, and the same nurse came in, carrying a food tray. "Dinner time," she trilled, and despite the fact that it was hospital food my stomach growled. Loudly. Ranger must have heard it, because he raised that damn eyebrow at me again.

The nurse set the tray on the table, took one last look at Ranger, and hurried out. I swear I saw her fanning herself.

"I'm starving," I said, as I took the lid off the tray. "One word and you're a dead man."

"My lips are sealed."

There were mashed potatoes, some hunk of what looked like it could be meat, slathered in what I hoped to God was brown gravy. Also there was a dish of mixed vegetables (ick), and a dinner roll. Okay, so I wasn't _that_ hungry. I wolfed down the potatoes and chowed the roll down in record time, and sat contemplating the consequences of the rest of it.

Ranger flipped open his cell phone and punched a number. "Steph needs food," he said, and flipped it closed.

"What was that all about?" I demanded.

"I called Tank. You'll thank me, babe."

I was all too happy to push the tray away. "Twigs and bark?" I asked innocently.

The corners of his mouth tipped up. "Keep it up," he said, and sat on my bed. He flipped on a baseball game, and I was instantly absorbed. The bed was pretty skinny, so I sat against his chest, one leg on each side of my body. Ranger leaned back, and I went with him. His arm came around me and rested protectively on my belly. It made me realize how close I'd come to never getting the privelege of having children. I was successful at blinking the tears back this time.

Score one for the Unstoppable Stephanie.

I must have dozed off for a while, because when I opened my eyes the tv was off and the lights were out in the room. Ranger was still behind me, the arm firmly in place. It was full dark outside now. The hospital was quiet. I couldn't help thinking that if I'd woken up alone in my apartment now, with everything black and quiet, I might have had a panic attack. But here, with Ranger's smell and warmth surrounding me, I felt safe. Maybe it wouldn't last beyond tonight, but it was all I needed for now.

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	9. Hurt Before

**Chapter Nine- Hurt Before**

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"**Hurt Before" By: The Corrs**

She's a girl in a world, she's moving as fast as she goes  
Loves her mum and her dad, the only secure that she knows  
But at night, she's alone, she's dreaming of somebody new  
Her someone for to hold, she's praying the dream will come true

Show me the way - show me, show me how  
Help me be brave - for love  
Show me the way - show me, tell me how  
What do you say

There's a pain in her heart, she's trying so hard to unwind  
Makes her cry in the night, when visions so real make her blind  
Wants to break through the fear  
Erasing the scars from within  
Start a new kind of being - she's down and she's praying again

Show me the way - show me, show me how  
Help me be brave - for love  
Show me the way - show me, tell me how  
What do you say

You see she's -  
Turning the key, unlocking the door  
Embracing the roller coaster world  
Stepping outside, with body and soul  
Taking whatever future holds  
Turning the key, unlocking the door  
Embracing the roller coaster world  
Take it in stride, you're just twenty-five  
And you know we've all been hurt before  
Yeah we've all been hurt before  
No You're not alone...

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I struck me as odd that I felt safe with a man I now knew to have killed at least four people. In some morbid way it made me feel even safer around him. Maybe he'd killed more in the past, but they weren't the issue right now. And after what Vino and his goons did to me, and to Tank, I was having a hard time working up any real sorrow for their deaths.

And I didn't know what was going on with Ranger. I know his life doesn't allow for relationships. So what's he doing keeping watch over me and protecting me? _Maybe that's all he can offer you right now_, a little voice in my head whispered. Besides, he's always kept watch over me. Probably had no choice.

Well, that would make better sense, I told the voice. And who asked you anyway? Still, I thought about this for a moment. The last night we spent together had been different also, but I just assumed it was a weather thing. I decided he was being friendly. I had had a really bad week. And maybe he felt partially responsible for what happened to me, because he asked me to do the job for him.

No, that was ridiculous. I told him I would do it. If I stick my neck out, which he should be used to by now, it's _my_ neck. _Ah, but maybe he realizes he cares about you_, the little voice said. I was beginning to get irritated with the little voice. So? I told the voice. And what if he did care? I cared about him too.

Stupid voice.

I had a cramp in my side from laying at an awkward angle, so I could only imagine how Ranger felt. I squirmed a little, trying to wiggle off the bed without Ranger knowing. A hand grabbed my elbow, and I yelped. "Just me, babe," he said, sitting up straight.

I put my feet to the floor and straightened, wincing as the cramp ran its course. "Have you been awake the whole time?" I asked, bending to stretch a little. The function was coming back to my limbs, and I didn't get tunnel vision when I stood up again.

"For awhile. Tank brought food," he said, indicating a white bag on the rolling table. There was a vase of flowers beside the bag.

I blinked. That meant he saw the cozy little scene with me and Ranger. Oh boy.

"And Morelli stopped by," he said. My heart stopped. That meant _he_ saw the cozy little scene. A knot formed in my stomach, followed by a lump in my throat. "He left you some flowers," he said, nudging me toward the table.

There was a card attached. I forced myself to pick it up, opened it with numb fingers, and read silently. 'I hope you feel better, Cupcake. I'm sorry I wasn't there. Morelli.' Hmm. I set the card back down. The snitty part of my brain said, "Well, at least someone was," but that was kind of mean and underhanded. But then, so was making out with Terry Gilman in the middle of _on-again_. So it was justified.

I moved to the bag next and peeked inside. "Omigod!" I said, and snatched a package. Tastykakes!!! The first one was in my mouth the minute it touched air. I went over to Rex's aquarium and dropped a piece inside. He raced out of the soup can, twitched his little whiskers at me as if to say _Hallelujah_, shoved the Tastykake in his pouch, and went back to the soup can.

"Poor little guy," I said, finishing off the rest.

Ranger was giving me the bemused face when I turned back around. "Is Tank single?" I asked.

Ranger just smiled more.

"Too bad. I could marry him."

"Better get in line. He told me Lula flashed him."

Unh. I'd forgotten, mercifully, about that. Until now. "He had a bad day too," I said. There were more Tastykakes in the bag, and nestled tightly next to them was a big cup of coffee. It was pure ambrosia next to water. Who the hell wanted to drink water for fun? Besides Ranger. The man was hot, but we needed to talk about nutrition. Mine, more than likely, but denial's stock was up today.

"I want to go get out of this hospital," I said, crinkling the wrapper. "They give me the creeps."

"They're releasing you in the morning."

"I know," I huffed, trying to stifle a yawn. So much for drinking the ambrosia. Ranger smiled and pointed me to the bed. When I didn't go immediately, he pushed me. One step, and another, and just one more. Then he lifted up me up and deposited me on my back. The bed was still warm, and still smelled like Ranger. Yum. I yawned again. Okay, maybe I was still just a little tired.

"Go to sleep," he said, pulling the covers over me.

I closed my eyes. "But I'm not tired," I mumbled, and I passed out.

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There were voices in my room when I woke up. The light outside was dim, but I could tell it was morning. Only Jersey could develop such cheery smog so early. I blinked to focus my eyes and looked around.

My mother, Lula, Connie, Valerie, and Grandma Mazur were standing around, trying unsuccessfully to speak in hushed tones.

"Omigod!" Valerie said, spotting me first. "She's awake!"

I was barraged by a multitude of questions and more than a few 'why me's from my mother. "They're hiring at the feminine products plant," she said, looking hopeful.

"Mom, this doesn't happen all the time. I'm fine. Really. Just bumps and bruises." Actually, I wasn't fine. But bluffing works.

"We were so worried!" Valerie said. "This almost beats when that guy held the hot poker to your arm." Unh. My family…

"Where's Dad?" I asked.

"Your father is outside with the cab," she explained. Wow, that made me feel loved.

"Ranger said we only got five minutes," Grandma Mazur said. Her outfit was blinding. Pink paisley polyester pants with a bright red Christmas sweater. I almost groaned. Grandma was dressing like Lula. God help us. "He don't want us giving you too much excitement too soon." She winked at me. "Maybe he's saving that for later!"

My mother crossed herself and muttered something. I didn't want to know what it was.

Connie smiled at me. "Your picture is all over the paper," she said, showing me the front page. "They made you out to be 'an unstoppable force of feminine persistence.' I don't know what that means. The article's pretty flattering actually." There was a very large, very _un_flattering picture of me unconscious on the floor in my apartment, as I'd been when the police arrived. I looked like a train wreck. There was a gash on my forehead, and I could now positively identify the warm stuff that had been in my eye as blood. Eeek. My face was bruised, and my body was curled in on itself. I looked like I'd been run over by a Mack truck.

"Flattering," I said.

Lula sauntered over. Her spandex pants were Day-Glo yellow, and she wore a bright Orange top. "Hunh," she said. "I leave you alone for five minutes."

Their smiles were bright, but they looked like they hadn't slept much. It hit home all of a sudden just how lucky I was to have people who cared about me. I had to get out of this hospital. It was doing things to my emotional being.

"I get to go home today," I said, sounding bright.

My mother rolled her eyes. "That apartment of yours isn't safe," she said. "Now that Valerie and the kids have a house, you could move in with us."

I'd rather stick a needle in my eye. "Thanks, Mom. I'll think about that."

Grandma Mazur leaned in close to me. "That Ranger fella's been real protective about the whole thing. Wouldn't let any of us in to see you until you were awake and feeling better, even when the hospital said it was okay."

What?! He'd told me the hospital wouldn't allow visitors. I was thinking I didn't want to hear anymore. Ranger had once told me he was an opportunist. But that had only been in reference to being back in my bed. He'd already been there. This wouldn't further his case, except to make me like him more as a person, and a friend. I did a mental head slap, followed by an eye roll. I really needed to grow up. I had just lost the man I thought I was going to marry one day, and now Ranger was acting like, like….Well, something. I didn't want to put my finger on it.

"Maybe you'll get married," Mom said loudly, shocking everyone in the room into stunned silence. "What?" she said. "He's an attractive man."

"Mom, I don't think--"

"What?" Valerie demanded. "I married Albert, for God's sake. Why couldn't you marry Ranger?"

I didn't have an answer to that, myself. Connie saved me. "Ranger's not exactly the marrying type."

"Nonsense," my mother said. This, of course, was a preposterous statement to my mother. All men were the marrying type. You just had to whack them over the head with a club and drag them back to your cave. Then they could spend eternity watching tv and driving a cab to get out of the house.

"I think Connie's right," I said. "He doesn't want to get married." And I wasn't so sure I did either. Ranger and I didn't even have a relationship. Well, we had a working relationship, but as far as emotions went, Ranger had already told me that they weren't involved. _So why is he being so protective_? Shut _up_, you stupid voice! I thought.

"Well," my mother said, "maybe you should comb your hair anyway. Just in case." She handed me a mirror and a brush, and I almost screamed. Valerie saw my dilemma and took over. In a flash she had all the tangles out, and even though the curls were still out of control, at least it wasn't a rat's nest anymore.

"Thanks," I said. I sat up, and was extremely happy when there was no dizziness. I would definitely get to go home now.

Connie came up to me. "We would have brought flowers, but Lula got us stuck in the line at Cluck in a Bucket for an hour."

"I was starving!" Lula said, rubbing at a grease stain on the orange top.

Connie rolled her eyes. "Don't hurry in to work. Vinnie doesn't say so, but I do." And Connie was pretty much the boss anyway, so I figured I might take her up on it. She smiled. "We, on the other hand, have a lot of work to do. Lula has all this filing to catch up on…"

Lula looked like she might protest. "It's okay," I said. "I'm going home soon. And I won't be alone. You guys should definitely go ahead."

" You just want to keep all of Ranger to yourself. Hunh," Lula said. And they left.

Whew. Two down, two to go.

Grandma looked at the flowers Joe had sent. "Whoopee," she said. "I bet these came from a real florist."

"Would you take them to the house and give them some fresh water?" I asked. Any excuse to get them out of the room. It was like they were staring at me, reminding me of how it must have looked to Morelli to come in the room and see Ranger and I lying together. It must have been a pretty tender scene. Okay. So I was getting a little desperate. Maybe I just wanted to think it had been a tender scene. Really, all it had been was…friendly. Boy, there was a lot of friendly in the air lately.

I had to get out of here. I wanted out of the stuffy hospital air, and the stark white paint. I wanted my dirty, small, furniture-less apartment.

"We'll take them," Mom said. She patted my hand. "You just rest. Your father's in the car outside, idling. Couldn't find a good parking space." I did another mental eye roll. People in Jersey would camp out days in advance for a good parking spot.

She scooped up the vase of flowers and Grandma Mazur, and then they were gone, too.

I heaved a sigh and got out of the bed. My duffel bag was on the floor against the wall, where Ranger had left it. Inside I found all my toiletries. Thank god. I brushed my teeth, applied a little mascara, and couldn't resist trying to cover the black eye with some foundation. After about thirty minutes, I decided I'd done a pretty decent job. The darkest purple was still visible, but I no longer looked like a domestic abuse victim.

I found a pair of jeans, a black t-shirt, and a pair of those black boy short underwear that I bought at Victoria's secret. Ranger's hands had been on my underwear. I fanned myself.

My big CAT boots were in the bottom, and I shoved my feet into them. Okay. I was all dressed. You could hardly see my black eye. But the bruises on my arms were still big and angry. Still, you could hardly beat two out of three.

I flopped onto the bed, only feeling a dull ache from the bruises. There was nothing on tv, and I had nothing to do. I started pacing.

The door pushed open, and the round nurse bustled inside. "Up and at 'em, I see," she said, popping a thermometer in my mouth. While she waited she set a small tray on the bed beside me, peeled the bandage off my forehead, and studied it for a moment. "Well, this is healing nicely. It's all closed up. You may have a scar, dear." She tut-tutted, replaced it with a much smaller bit of gauze, and secured it with a strip of tape.

"Well, you're free to go," she said. "There are some papers for you to sign at the front desk, and you'll be on your way. That tall man is out there waiting for you. And just between you and me, he's a dish. He's got half my staff falling all over themselves."

"He has that effect," I said.

The nurse smiled and left.

Her words sank in suddenly. Omigod. Ranger had been standing outside. That meant he was probably there through the visit with my mother. And the getting married talk. Unh.

I looked at the big duffel bag and debated whether I should try and lift it or drag it down the hall. That would probably be painful to carry. Dragging sounded much better.

"There's smoke coming from your ears, babe," Ranger said, making me jump.

I put a hand to my heart. "You scared me." He smiled. "You have to stop using that ESP stuff. It gives me the creeps."

The smile widened. "Liar." He slung the duffel bag over his shoulder. Rex's cage was under his other arm. "Come on, Destructo."

I followed him to the office and stopped, took care of all the paperwork, and we were on our way. Out into the dim Jersey day.

Ranger's Porsche Turbo was in the fire lane. A cop was standing by, looking as though he might put a ticket on the windshield. He saw Ranger, and the ticket pad snapped closed. He nodded, and walked away.

"If that had been me, my car would be in an impound lot," I grumbled, as he threw my bag into the back seat. I took Rex's cage and put it on my lap.

We roared off to my apartment. Ranger slid into his zone, and I was left with my thoughts. Not good. My thoughts were disturbing. The bits of Ranger I'd seen since I was attacked were not consistent with the image I had compiled in my brain.

"What's going on?" I asked.

Ranger looked at me.

"I mean it. What's going on? You're acting strange. You never act like this."

The corner of his mouth tipped up. "How do you know how I act?"

"Because. Because, well, because…you've never acted this way before!" Lame answer. Try again. "You told me the hospital didn't allow visitors. I heard a different story this morning."

"You didn't need the extra trauma of your family at the moment," he said.

Oh. I thought about that. Okay, good explanation.

"I told you my lifestyle doesn't lend itself to relationships," Ranger said. "Only working ones. This one's working."

"Working as in profession, or working as in functioning."

He just smiled.

"It's a good thing you've got a nice ass," I said. This was not the first time I had used this line. He irritated me and turned me on all at once. How screwy was that?

We were both silent the rest of the way home. Ranger with that semi-smile riding on his face. Me with my thoughts. Again.

When we pulled into the parking lot, I glanced up at my apartment window. It was darkened, and a curl of panic went through my belly. Everything was okay. The apartment was clean. The police were done there. It was safe. _But for how long_?

The little voice was really getting old. And it was right. My apartment must be the easiest thing to break into since a plastic bag. People made a habit of it. Sometimes I think they break in just to take a number and be like 'Yeah, I broke into Stephanie Plum's apartment.'

"Babe," he said, touching my arm to get my attention. "Come on," he said, and got out. "It's now or never." He came around and took Rex's cage so I could get out, and handed it back when I closed the door. The bag was slung over his shoulder again, and we headed for the elevator.

"Never would be good," I grumbled, following along behind him.

Mrs. Bestler took one look at me and punched the button. She didn't even call out the floors. Wow. I must really look like hell.

When we got to my door Ranger extracted my keys from his deep dark jeans pocket. What I wouldn't give to be a mouse in _there_, I thought. I _knew_ what it was like in that pocket. Whew. Hot flash.

I would have given it more thought but just then he pushed the door open. He went about his usual prowl through my apartment. I never got tired of seeing him check everything out. Mostly because it gave me time to check _him_ out. At least I was honest.

I was still in the doorway. Did I really want to go back in here? I mean, there were more death cooties in this apartment now. People had died in here. Several, in fact. I don't know why it didn't weird me out before, but now it was seriously giving me the willies. This was almost worse than knowing my couch had death cooties.

Ranger turned around. "All clear." I didn't move. Probably I looked a little panicked because he walked across the room to me, picked me up and carried me across the threshold, inside.

A little thrill jumped in my chest, and my heart started beating madly. "Wow," I blurted out. "I feel like I just got married or something."

_Omigod_!!! I couldn't believe I just said that out loud. I clapped my hand over my mouth and gaped at Ranger, eyes wide. First my mother and now me! I needed to get my head examined.

"Are you trying to tell me something, babe?"

He set me down gently on my feet, still gaping at him. "I didn't mean to say that," I said, trying to cover up. "I just meant that…that…Shit. I meant something."

"That's what worries me," he said. And then kissed me, deeply. Yum.

When he finally let me go, I was puffing. "Okay," I said, pushing my hair out of my face and trying not to look as flustered as I felt. "I'm in my apartment." I looked around. The place was immaculate. "Wow. Very clean."

"You need to go to the station and give them your statement today," he said, making a pot of coffee. It occurred to me that he really knew his way around my kitchen. Didn't even have to open a single unnecessary drawer. Even _I_ opened unnecessary drawers. The man was a wonder.

"Thanks for reminding me," I said, and sighed.

"I have to get to work," he said, setting the coffee to brew. I followed him to the door.

"Thank you," I said, suddenly feeling like a very big pain in the ass. Ranger was too old to have to baby-sit anyone.

He smiled at me. "All part of that working relationship," he said, giving me the almost-smile.

I sighed. "Yeah, but what kind of working?"

He leaned in and brushed my lips. "I'll check on you later," he said. And he was gone.

"Ass!" I yelled down the hallway. This got me the full two hundred watt grin.

I turned around and slammed my door.

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	10. All In A Day

**Author's note:** Okay, guys, I hope you like this part! I worked really hard on it, so I'd love it if you'd let me know what you think. I hope you enjoy this chapter (it's the longest of any yet!). Settle in and happy reading!

--RhianaRae

**Chapter Ten- All In A Day**

**All In A Day- by The Corrs**

All in a day, she saw the face in the mirror lie  
To her dismay, she saw the child that was in her die  
And she cried... overnight  
'Cos what she sees... she doesn't like

Just let me float, just let me drift on by  
No more, no pain  
I don't have tears to cry

I'm twisting  
I'm turning  
I'm aching  
And it's burning  
In one day... in one day

**Chapter Ten- All In A Day**

I locked every lock on my door and looked around at my apartment. Rex seemed to have snuggled back in successfully. His feet were a pink blur, the wheel spinning a million miles an hour and squeaking softly. He looked more than happy with his life. But then, he didn't have to worry about psychos shooting him. Okay, there was that one time, but I had saved him.

Just like Ranger had been there to save me.

I snapped myself out of what were fast becoming deep thoughts. That was dangerous territory. Too much thinking like that and I might actually figure out my life. Wasn't that a scary thought?

My apartment was spotless. I had nothing to clean. I went into my bedroom. My quilt was back on the bedspread, smoothed of any lumps. It looked so inviting. A tingle pricked the back of my neck, and I whirled around, my heart beating a million miles an hour. Nothing.

Shit, Stephanie, I thought. Get a grip already. I went through my drawers. All my clothes were just as they'd been. When Ranger had come to get my things he'd been respectful, not just rifling through carelessly.

The bathroom was gleaming. This gave me an idea. I rushed to my bed, flung back the dust ruffle, and gasped.

I snatched my cell phone and punched in Ranger's number.

There was a smirk in his voice as he answered "Yo."

"You had them clean under my bed," I said, not asking. I was accusing.

This got me a laugh. "Told you you needed to get a mop under there," he said, and disconnected.

I sighed. My apartment was so clean it was wrong. I decided I should have a cup of the coffee Ranger made, and dirty at least a dish. The smell wafted through the rooms and tickled my nose, so I followed it into the kitchen, grabbed the biggest mug I could find, and filled it to the brim. Rex was off his wheel now, looking at me expectantly. He was much happier when I dropped a chunk of cheese and a grape in his cage.

There was nothing on tv. I was stuck here. And the bumps and bruises on my body were starting to protest. A hot shower would maybe wash away the willies and some of the pain. I had a prescription for pain pills to fill. Maybe I would do that later. I really didn't like to take pills, but if the bruises on my back and legs were any indication, my body was going to start to stiffen up like a dead thing. Another reason to take a hot shower.

I cuddled up to the arm of the couch and sipped my coffee, wishing it were Ranger's arm. I had it bad. Not only did I seriously want him, and wasn't really afraid of him anymore after living in his apartment, but I was becoming emotionally attached to him. And that was a bad thing. Ranger had said it himself on more than one occasion, but he'd also told me he loved me. So maybe he was having the same problem. My lifestyle didn't lend itself to relationships either. This latest incident rammed it home more than anything else had.

So maybe, just maybe, it was okay to have the emotions here. Maybe in time our lives would allow for a real relationship. _That's an awful lot of maybes_. Shut up, you stupid voice.

"God, Stephanie, get real," I said out loud, startling myself. Okay, so it really was a lot of maybes. I would give myself a few moments to fantasize and be totally honest. I wanted Ranger. And I loved him. I wasn't sure exactly in what way it was that I loved him. He tugged at my heart more and more every day. Maybe I was _in_ love with him. Yeesh.

"Okay, so let's pretend I _am_ in love with him," I mused to my coffee cup. What would that mean? If I told him, which (Eeek!) I doubted would ever happen, how would he react? Besides tossing me out a window or something, I had no idea. It was obvious that he felt something for me. I mean, the man got shot the first time I asked him for help. But he stuck around, keeping me safe. And he still was.

But what did that mean?

And why the hell did I suddenly even care? _Because you're scared spitless_. Okay. I was scared to death. My home had been invaded, _again_, and I felt violated. I was tired of being shot at, punched, kicked, burned, and stalked. And now, thanks to the perfect Valerie's baby and subsequent marriage, I realized I wanted those things, too. Wonderful. Let's just complete that picture.

I couldn't exactly see me being Ranger's wife. Living in the Bat Cave, bearing his children. Ludicrous. I didn't see him coming home to me every day, giving me that semi-kiss that was barely more than just a brush of his lips across mine. How ridiculous. And I certainly didn't see me pregnant with his child. Didn't see him putting his hands to my swollen tummy and giving me those Ranger eyes. Nope. I couldn't see any of that stuff.

A tear slid down my cheek. What was with the tears! I swiped at it, and looked at my reflection in the coffee, all swirly from my sudden movement. That swirl was just like my future with Ranger. It made absolutely no sense.

"That's because none of that stuff is ever going to happen, Stephanie," I said, tipping the mug up and draining it dry. "So stop mooning over it, pull up your big girl underpants, and go take a damn shower."

Good idea. I returned the mug to the kitchen and stared at the door. All the locks in the world couldn't keep Ranger out. Apparently, his skills worked on more than just locks.

They worked on hearts, too.

God, I was a case. I refused to admit that I was in love with Ranger. This was all hypothetical, and was a dangerous thing to muse about for a number of reasons, not the least of which was the fact that Ranger probably didn't return these feelings. Even if he did, he obviously had no intentions of allowing them any sway over his life or his decisions about me. In his line of work he couldn't afford to do that. It was a trick I wish I knew.

So I did what any girl would do in my situation. I turned my tv on loudly to drown out any scary apartment noises, went into the bathroom and turned the water to hot, stripped, and got into the shower. Okay, maybe not any girl would do this, but it made sense to me.

Oops. I forgot the bandage on my forehead. Probably it was okay to take it off now. I carefully peeled it away and tossed it in the garbage. I took a look at myself in the mirror and winced. This was nasty. An icky red line stretched an inch diagonally across my forehead, blending into my hairline. It wasn't wide or deep, but it looked gross anyway. Thank god they hadn't had to stitch it. Many months ago, my hair had been chopped on enough to last a lifetime. It had finally reached my shoulders again.

A bottle of Ranger's brand of shower gel sat on the shower shelf. I couldn't have Ranger here all the time, but with the way the scent hung on maybe it would make me feel like he was closer.

I shivered as the scent hit my nose. Great, now I was in the shower, hot and slippery with Ranger's shower gel, the sexy scent of him all around me, and I was having flashbacks to the few nights before, when we'd been together. Good thing my mother told me I'd go blind for dealing with that. It reminded me of a similar situation I'd been in when Ranger's apartment had been the only safe haven I could turn to, and his shower gel had conveniently been all that was available to wash with. That had been a problem then, too. The scent was sinfully addictive. And seductive.

I stood under the spray for a long time. My skin was turning pruney, and the aches in my body (both kinds) had begun to subside. I washed my hair, shaved my armpits and legs before I was too stiff to do it later, and stood under the spray some more. It felt like heaven, and smelled like heaven, and I could think of no place I'd rather have been.

Okay, I could think of one place.

I finally dragged myself out of the steamy bathroom, wrapped in a big fluffy towel. The comfort of a big fat t-shirt and a pair of boxers was irresistible, so I found a black t-shirt and the pair of boxers from Victoria's Secret and threw them on. My hair was still wet, but I didn't care. Let it stay wet. It took a lot of motivation and effort to blow-dry my hair, and I just wasn't into it.

I looked in the mirror. Yikes. My face still looked awful. Probably these bruises would go away in a week, but until then I could think of nothing better to do than hide out. That wouldn't happen, because I didn't do well with sitting in my apartment.

I felt languid and sleepy, and the scent of Ranger around me gave me the feeling of security, even if it was bogus. Maybe a quick nap…

I eased myself under the quilt, and fell asleep the moment my head touched the pillow.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

I woke up who knew how much later, sweating profusely. My cheeks were wet, and I was shaking. Jesus. I sat straight up and rubbed at my eyes. The clock said six forty-eight. That had been a long nap.

And it had been an awful nightmare. I'd been in the shower, standing under the spray, enjoying the smell of Ranger. There had been a sound in the front of my apartment, causing me to pause. I turned the spray off, grabbed a towel and wrapped myself in it. My heart had been beating so fast I thought it would pop out of my chest, just as it still was.

I peeked around the bathroom door and screamed. Tank was on the floor, trussed up like a criminal, and the scary man was back, shocking him. Eddie Abruzzi was there, dressed in his Napoleon's uniform. He stood in the corner, his crazy eyes smiling at me. Vino Santinni was there, too. A neat round hole stood out on his forehead. The youngest Cone brother was there, his Buzz Lightyear sweatshirt still on. There was blood oozing from his chest in three places, where I'd shot him. And Benito Ramirez was there as well, sitting on my couch. He smiled that psycho smile and trilled "Stephanieeeee…."

Joe and Terry Gilman were standing in my kitchen, embracing each other and watching me. There was no feeling in Joe's eyes as he watched me. Terry said something to him and he smiled at her, bending in for a passionate kiss. I searched the rest of the apartment. No Ranger.

Eddie and Benito closed in on me. There was a fire poker in Abruzzi's hand, and it glowed red. Ramirez cracked his knuckles. And then they attacked me. Tank made horrible noises as the cruel man shocked him, over and over. Ramirez grabbed my hands behind my back and held me still. I think I fought him, but my eyes were glued to the fire poker. Abruzzi advanced and laughed, and then he held the poker to my neck. My skin sizzled and burned, and I screamed. I didn't know if I had screamed in my sleep, but my hand involuntarily went to my throat. Nothing.

I was shaking so bad my teeth were chattering. I felt suffocated, and I couldn't breathe. I think maybe I was hyperventilating. I needed to get out of the apartment, away from the memories and the nightmare.

In record time I was stripped out of my nightclothes and dress in jeans and a black stretchy t-shirt. I pulled on a pair of running shoes and grabbed Ranger's heavy black sweatshirt from my bottom drawer. My wet hair was chilling my skin, so I went into the bathroom to dry it. I didn't bother with gel and the results were almost as scary as the nightmare had been. So I pulled Ranger's Navy Seal hat from the top shelf of my closet and shoved my hair through the hole in the back. Better. I grabbed my pocketbook and my keys and hauled ass out of my apartment. A part of me almost felt bad for leaving Rex there alone, but he was probably safe. It was usually only me people wanted to kill.

I didn't even know where I was going. Probably I could go to Pino's and have some pizza and beer. Or I could go to the mall. It would still be open. Anywhere was fine so long as it wasn't my apartment. Okay, I didn't want to go to Pino's. There would be cops there, and questions would be asked. I wasn't ready for that either. That left the mall.

My bank account was considerably larger than it had been in a very long time. I had money to spend. Maybe that would make me feel better. I need furniture anyway. There was a really good furniture store in the mall. But no, it's not a good idea to buy furniture when you're upset. Okay, shoes then. And a large fries and a Coke from McDonald's.

Mrs. Bestler smiled at me as I got in. "Going down," she said. "Parking garage, and black market merchandise."

This made me smile. At least my car was still unharmed. It was a hell of a thing to get insurance when all your vehicles got blown up all the time. And I couldn't forget the garbage truck. That had been a doozy.

Traffic was light on the way to the mall. I turned off Route One and sailed into the parking lot. It was pretty full, but I managed to find an okay spot. Next stop shoes and better things.

I tried on fifteen pairs of shoes. Stilettos, slingbacks, pumps, and mules. I bought four pair, one of each kind and all in black, and lugged the bags out of the store. Okay, I was spending to combat emotions. But I had earned it, I told myself. And it felt good. In Nordstrom's I treated myself to a few new dresses and a couple pairs of designer jeans. Sexy, bootcut, black, and sleek. They'd look good with the stilettos I'd just bought.

Suddenly, I was angry. I was tired of suffering the consequences of my stupidity. I was going to start learning how to do this right, dammit. Getting what you deserved wasn't fair. Something had to change. First thing tomorrow I was going to tell Ranger I wanted training. _Serious_ training. I would learn to use my gun, and I was going to like it. I would learn self-defense, and I would learn how to be like Ranger. I was tired of being the one to be crappy at being a badass.

And I wanted to be sexy. I needed a new image. Something to reinvent myself enough that I'd feel like I was starting fresh. Maybe that would chase all the bad memories away. I could just lock them in a far corner of my brain and throw away the key. I bet Ranger had to do that with some of the stuff he'd been forced to do. Maybe he'd tell me how to do it.

On that inspiration I turned on my heel and marched back into the store. When I emerged I was the proud (and much poorer) owner of a new jogging suit, two pairs of black yoga pants, three different pairs of running shorts in black, red, and dark gray, two gray tank tops, two new black tank tops, three silky camisoles in black, three different kinds of sexy black pinstriped and solid slacks, a pair of black carpenter pants, a black angora sweater, two black cardigans, another pair of running shoes, and a pair of sexy black heeled boots. Maybe I couldn't miraculously turn into Ranger, but I could damned well dress the part.

I was a little tired by the time I was done shopping Nordstrom's, so I went back out to my car. Even hauling the seven shopping bags to the car was a chore. Maybe I wasn't quite ready to do all this yet. No, I thought, shaking my head. Now or never.

I stuffed the bags into the back of the Escape and roared out of the parking lot, on my way home. Okay, the Escape didn't roar. Maybe I needed a sexier car, too. Well, I couldn't afford a sexier car. That would have to wait until…well, I didn't know when, if ever, I'd be able to afford a sexy car. Maybe a Miata. But that would be hard to haul FTAs in with. This I would have to think about. I certainly couldn't afford a Mercedes or a Porsche like Ranger had.

But maybe I could buy one from Ranger. Hmm. He'd always loaned me one before. I could just ask him to get me one from whoever he got his from, and I'd give him the money, or make payments or whatever. That sounded like an almost workable idea.

I was going to be Badass Stephanie, the Bombshell Bounty Hunter. And I was going to do it right.

My bravado collapsed when I pulled into my parking lot. I'd left all the lights on in my apartment, but just the sight of the window made me start shaking. Every other light was darkened. I looked at my watch. Shit. I'd spent a while in the mall. It was late.

I sucked in a deep breath and gathered up my bags from the back. Now or never, I repeated in my head. Now or never.

Mrs. Bestler smiled at my bags. "PMS?"

"You have no idea."

The doors opened and I made my way to the end of the hall. My hands were shaking so badly I dropped the keys. Shit. I looked at my door and looked at the keys on the ground. There was no one in my apartment. It was okay. I hadn't been attacked in at least twenty-four hours. See? All safe.

But I couldn't make my legs move. I was petrified, frozen in place by a sudden fear that I had never known. I was so scared I could feel my heart shivering in my chest, my teeth were chattering, and I was breathing fast and shallow. I forced myself to breathe slower, and managed to pick up my keys. I kept seeing all those other men. Ramirez, Abruzzi, Cone, Santinni…I relived this most recent scene with a violent shudder. I wondered how Tank was coping. Knowing Tank, he was fine. I was the only one still freaking out.

And right there, in my hallway, I had a breakdown. Tears began streaming down my face. I sat down, hard, and scooted up against the wall, all my bags around me like a flimsy paper fortress. I was sobbing, open-mouthed, convulsive sobs that shook my entire body like an earthquake. I relived every second of every horrible thing that had happened to me since I'd taken this job, and I grieved and dealt with them. All except the latest. I didn't know how to deal with that. Mostly, I was just terrified. Bone-shaking terrified.

And I was still afraid of my apartment.

I stood on shaky knees and looked at my door. All I had to do was put the key in the lock, turn it, and go inside. Easy, right? Wrong. I got the key within six inches of the doorknob and my hands started shaking again. I dropped the keys back on the ground and took up my place against the wall.

Mechanically, I found my cell phone and punched in a number. I was still sniffling, trying to hold back the hysteria at the back of my throat. I swallowed a few times, but the panic was still there, fighting to get out.

"Yo," Ranger's voice said softly.

I almost laughed I was so close to the edge. I couldn't say anything. My voice was stuck.

"Stephanie?" he said. I could picture him coming instantly alert and afraid for me. That wasn't fair to do to him.

"I…I need you," I managed to choke out. Oh, god, how stupid was that? "N-n-never mind. I'm okay," I said, and hung up.

The tears came again, and I couldn't stop them. I just let them wash over me. I couldn't even ask Ranger to save me. I was so afraid, and so ashamed. I just wanted to crawl in a big black safe hole and pull it in after me, and maybe sleep for a hundred years or so.

So I sat in my hall and cried, albeit a little more quietly than before. I cried for myself, mostly. I figured I'd neglected my own feelings long enough, and indulged in a little self-pity. So much for the new and improved Stephanie, I thought bitterly. I was a coward. I couldn't deal with this. It took a toughness to do this job, and I didn't have it. My reaction right now proved it more than all the blown up cars ever could. I was a screw-up, Grade A.

I pulled me knees in to my chest and covered my head with my hands. The brim of the hat hid my face from anyone who might pass by. But it was late, so I didn't expect anyone. Nobody except some random psychotic killer who would chop me into little pieces and fry me for dinner.

I hiccupped on another sob, and buried my head between my knees. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't stop the damn tears. It was like they'd found the weak spot in the dam, and burst through to freedom. Maybe I'd held it all in a little too long. Probably my emotions were just really tired. Pretending to be tough and strong when you're not wears on you.

There was suddenly a presence looming above me, and I yelped, leaping to my feet, ready to flee. Strong arms grabbed me up and crushed me to a muscular chest, and I blindly struggled through my tears to get free.

"Babe," a voice said, cutting through my hysteria, and I went limp, like a rag doll. My heart had stopped beating in my chest, and my breathing along with it.

"Ranger," I choked out, burying my face into the hollow of his shoulder. I would have climbed inside his skin if I could.

The tears kept coming, and his strong arms crushed me close. A hand stroked my hair and my back, rubbing gently. "I'm s-s-sorry," I said, gasping for breath. "I don't know what's wrong. I can't stop…"

I took a deep shuddering breath and let it out slowly. "I couldn't stay. I had to get out of the apartment. I took a shower and fell asleep. The nightmare… All of them were there. Ramirez and Abruzzi and Cone and Santinni. They were going to hurt me. And Joe was there, and Terry," I said, my voice trembling uncontrollably. I tried to steady it, but I couldn't. My whole body was vibrating.

"And I was so scared. I went to the mall and went shopping. I decided I wanted to be like you and never be scared, but then I got back here and I couldn't open my door. My legs wouldn't move and I dropped my keys." I was babbling incoherently now, sobbing between breaths. My tears soaked his shoulders.

He set me away from him for a second, and I resisted. "Stephanie," he said, tipping my chin up to look into his deep chocolate eyes. My lower lip was trembling, and I had to blink several times just to clear my eyes enough so that I focus. "I'm here now. Everything's going to be okay," he said, rubbing his hands up and down my chilled arms. He gathered me close again and rubbed against my cheek. "It's going to be okay."

I snuggled into his warmth. My safe haven, as usual. And at that precise moment that he whispered those words, my heart opened. I loved him. Shit. I really did. And I didn't want to ever be away from him again.

He kissed my temple and eased back to look in my eyes. "You don't have to go to the apartment again. I want you to come home with me," he said. "I have an empty studio apartment available. It's waiting for you to move in. I want you to work for me, Stephanie. Will you do that?"

I looked up at him, uncomprehending. Ranger wanted me to live with him? No, he'd offered me an apartment. A safe place. "For how long?" I whispered. My throat was raw and sore from crying. Tears still slipped from my eyes and tracked down my cheeks.

This got me a smile. "Forever," he said, and reached up with both hands to dry the wetness from my face. "I need you," he said, and followed it quickly with, "and the rest of my staff needs you. I want you close."

I suspected there was more to those words than professional friendliness, but I didn't have the energy to push it. This was more than I could have hoped for. Ever. If I was working for Ranger, maybe he'd train me. "But I'm useless," I said, my voice still a little trembly. "Look at me," I said. "I'm such a fucking coward."

"You are not a coward," Ranger said, his voice harsh. Surprised, I jerked my eyes up to meet his. They were black, and they burned. "You've been through more than any woman I know could handle and still be sane."

"I'm not sane," I said. "I'm a basket case."

"It all had to come out sometime, babe." He looked at me again. "Will you accept my offer?" he said, boring into me with those damn eyes of his. God, I really did love this man. The Man of Mystery had stolen my damn heart, and I had no choice in the matter. And I really didn't want any.

The eyes softened. He took a deep breath. "It's all I can offer you right now."

I looked up at him. His face was drawn and pinched from worry, and there was a slight darkness beneath his eyes. This man had protected me and taken care of me, and had saved my life. And now he was offering me more.

"Yes," I said, attempting a wobbly smile. "I'll come home with you."

He sighed, picked my keys off the ground, and lifted me into his arms. "I'm going to take you inside, but only long enough to pack you a bag. Okay?"

I nodded against his neck. In a few steps he was at my couch, and settled me onto it. "I'm going to get your things from outside. Will you be okay here?"

I was fine as long as he was near me. I felt safe. "Yes," I said. "I'm alright."

Then he was gone. I stared straight ahead, my hands clasped in my lap. The tears had mostly stopped, and when my eyes welled up I was able to blink them back. I wanted all of this to go away. I was tired, and I was still afraid. Safe, but afraid nonetheless.

Ranger went past me into my bedroom. I heard him pull my two large black suitcases from the closet, and heard drawers open and close. Then I heard him go into my bathroom. Items clattered together as he added them to the bags. I imagine he was pretty well cleaning everything out.

When he came out the suitcases were filled to capacity. The muscles in his biceps bulged under the strain. He put the suitcases by the door, went into the kitchen, and turned off my coffee put, then unplugged it.

And then he came back to me. He held his hand out, and I took it, thinking that maybe I was taking his hand in more ways than one, and he pulled me to my feet. "Do you think you can carry Rex's cage?" he asked, and I nodded.

I picked up the cage and followed him out the door without a backward glance. He must have gathered the shopping bags, flipped the lights off and locked the door, but I didn't care. I was leaving this place, once and for all. I guess maybe I would miss my neighbors, and the fact that I knew everybody here. But I couldn't live here anymore. Too many bad memories.

Ranger's Cayenne was parked in the fire lane, and he set my bags in the back. He opened the door for me, took Rex's cage and waited until I was in and buckled, and handed him back. Seconds later we were zooming out of the parking lot and on our way to his apartment building. He zoned out, and I took the opportunity to do the same. I shut off my thinking process as best I could, and admired the streetlights.

When he finally came to a stop in the black basement, I looked around. A few black SUVs were parked against the far wall, and the rest of Ranger's cars were present and accounted for. I got out and out of an old habit headed for the elevator. Ranger was right behind me with my bags, and he stepped in behind me. He used his black plastic key tag to get us to the seventh floor, and then we were in his apartment.

"I thought you had an apartment for me," I said dumbly, looking around.

Ranger carted my bags into his room and set them down. "I do," he said. "But I told you I want you close tonight," he said, coming back to stand before me. He took Rex's cage and set it on the counter. "Is that okay with you?"

It was more than okay.

"Are you tired?" he asked. I shook my head. It was strange to be back in Ranger's apartment again. The familiar clean scent assailed my nose, and I breathed in. Here, I felt truly safe. I let the deep breath out and looked at him.

"I'm really sorry about all this," I said. "You're always having to baby-sit me."

Ranger shook his head. "I'm not baby-sitting you."

"Then why are you always there?" I asked, feeling suddenly brave. I might as well go a little deeper. "Every time I'm in trouble, there you are, like some…"

"What," he said. "What am I like, babe?" He wasn't making fun of me. His eyes were soft, and his voice was soft. This was a side I rarely saw. I had to take advantage of it while I had the opportunity.

"Like a goddamn knight in shining armor," I finished, sighing. "Why?"

He shook his head again. This time, there was a wry smile tipping up a corner of his mouth. "Haven't you figured it out yet?"

I shook my head. "I'm afraid to."

This got me a smile. "Yeah. Me, too." He kissed me lightly. "I'm going to have some food sent up. You haven't eaten since last night."

Shit. I had forgotten my Coke and fries. "How do you know?" I demanded. The eyebrow went up. "Okay, fine. You're Batman, I forgot."

"I'm not Batman, babe. I just know you."

"Maybe too well," I said, lifting my chin in a defiant gesture.

"Maybe." He went to the phone and pressed a button. "Dinner for two tonight," he said, and let the button out.

"What, does Ella just sit around and wait for you to give her an order?" I asked, exasperated. It weirded me out to have a personal chef/cleaning lady.

"No. The message goes to a machine. When she sees the light blinking she checks it."

"Oh." I had no follow-up for this.

"Come on," he said, pulling the hat off my head. "You need to change."

"I am changing," I pointed out, the chin still up.

Ranger paused. "I meant your clothes," he said, smiling.

I blushed. "I knew that."

"Right. Put some pajamas on. Dinner should be here soon."

I couldn't argue with a real dinner. Someday I should probably learn to cook for myself. A person couldn't thrive on Pino's pizza and Tastykakes. Okay, I could, but I should learn anyway.

I rifled through my bags and found the t-shirt and boxers I'd been wearing earlier. For some strange reason, I felt like I couldn't put them on. They were a remnant of earlier tonight, and I wanted to forget it. Instead I went to the shopping bags and pulled out a gray tank top and the pair of black shorts. They would do for pajamas, I figured.

I unzipped Ranger's sweatshirt and put it in the bag, and kicked out of my jeans. My body was starting to hurt again, and I wanted to lay down. The only thing that kept me going was the thought of the food Ella was bringing. She really was a good cook. So I continued undressing and then put the tank and shorts on.

I padded barefoot back into the living room. I could see Ranger setting out plates on the dining table, and I pulled silverware out to help him. He took them from me and directed me to the couch. "Relax," he said.

Again, arguing just seemed out of place. I didn't want to argue. I wanted to be taken care of and maybe just a little bit spoiled. That made me think of Morelli. He always said the things I needed to hear, but I don't think he ever spoiled me. It was a little easier to look back and see the signs that maybe he was needing something besides me to satisfy him. It didn't hurt as much as it did before, but the sting was there. Once again, I'd screwed up another relationship.

Okay, maybe it hadn't really been my fault. Morelli had wanted me to be a different person. Dickie was just a horse's behind. At least Ranger didn't have any designs on Joyce Barnhardt. I didn't think.

"What are your thoughts on Joyce Barnhardt?" I called to Ranger, and heard him pause. Probably wondering what the hell I was talking about.

He poked his head around. "Not interested."

"At the moment, or permanently not interested?" I pressed.

Ranger shook his head, that bemused smile curling his lips. "Permanently," he said, and disappeared around the corner again.

Okay, I thought. Good.

There was a knock on the door a few minutes later, and Ella poked her head in. "You can just leave it on the table," Ranger told her. She sent a bright smile to me, probably hoping I would still be Ranger's girlfriend someday. Then she said goodnight to Ranger and disappeared through the door.

"Food," Ranger said by way of summoning me. It was too late. The smell of delicious meat, fish I thought, wafted through to my nose. My stomach growled loudly, and I sat down. He lifted the lids of the dishes, and I was greeted by a variety of delicacies. There were grilled halibut steaks, mushrooms marinated in white wine, angelhair pasta, sautéed asparagus, and garlic bread.

"Omigod," I said. Ranger smiled and dished food onto my plate. He slid it directly under my nose, and the delicious aromas made me lightheaded. "How does Ella do that so fast?"

"Even I don't know," he said, filling his own plate. We ate in companionable silence, neither one of us wanting to talk and not particularly needing to. I was more assured of his company now than I had been before. Living in a man's home will do that to you, I supposed.

When every last morsel of food was cleaned from my plate, I sat back, suddenly glad of the stretchy running shorts. Ranger read my mind again, and this got me a smile. He had finished a few minutes earlier and sat watching me with a thoughtful expression on his face. I didn't ask what he was thinking, and he didn't volunteer anything.

I yawned, a big body-relaxing yawn. "That was the most amazing meal I have ever eaten," I said. "Don't tell my mom, but Ella's cooking is better than hers."

"Your secret's safe with me, babe," he said, pushing his chair back and coming around the table to me. "Come on," he said. "Bed time."

"Where do you want me to sleep?"

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Do you need to ask?"

"Oh good. I thought you were going to deny me your sheets." See, I was feeling better. I could make a joke already.

Ranger's eyes softened. "And all this time I thought it was my body you wanted."

"Silly man," I said, wandering past him into the bedroom. He was close on my heels. I could feel the heat of him prickling the hairs on the backs of my arms. I could also hear him laughing under his breath. I managed to find my toothbrush and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. When I came back out he was sitting on the bed, untying his laces.

"I'm going to take a shower," he said, shucking the boots. He took his socks off, then took his watch off and laid it on the nightstand. I raised my eyebrows. "Nothing you haven't seen before," he said.

I slipped beneath the covers and sighed at the feel of the soft sheets on my skin. This was so nice. And Ranger was so getting naked in front of me. I would recommend naked-Ranger-therapy to all trauma victims. All other thoughts went out of my head, and I think I might have drooled.

The t-shirt came off next, tossed over the back of a chair. His belt came off next, to lie on top of the t-shirt. And he stripped off the black cargo pants. My mouth went dry, and I swallowed convulsively. Ranger didn't disappoint. No underwear.

This was the first time I'd seen him naked in the light, and good grief, the man was sheer perfection. He knew it and I knew it. The gentle light reflected off his mocha-latte skin, highlighting the buff biceps, the eight-pack abs, the bump of his hip flexors. His… I gulped, and looked away.

I'd been busted admiring his assets, however, and Ranger grinned at me. "Don't tempt me, babe," he said, and went into the bathroom, treating me to a lovely view of his backside.

When he was gone I fanned myself. He was gorgeous. I was having a hot flash. Definitely Ranger-therapy was the best treatment for trauma. Mmm-hmmm…

The shower spray turned on, and a visual of him in the shower popped into my head. Yikes. And yum. And then the smell of Ranger's shower gel came with it. That smell was burned into my receptors. I could never again smell it without thinking of Ranger. And it turned me on.

Crap. I wasn't supposed to get turned on. I had barely begun to come to grips with the fact that I loved the man, and that was hard to do when he was naked fifteen feet away.

I must have been stressing over this for quite a chunk of time, because the water stopped in the bathroom. A minute later Ranger came out, towel around his waist. I tried to swallow but found it difficult. He saw this and grinned at me. His hair was wet and hanging freely down. Droplets of water were still beaded on his shoulders, chest, and neck.

I later decided that I had been possessed or something, because I was out of the bed in a heartbeat. I stalked across the room to the half-naked specimen of male perfection, and glared at him. He smelled so damn good. It was a drug, maybe. There was something slipped in the shower gel that intoxicated me. That was a pretty good excuse. Later, maybe I'd try and convince myself it was true.

"This is all your fault," I said, still glaring.

Ranger raised an eyebrow at me, and his eyes dropped momentarily to my chest. My nipples tightened and shrunk in response, and he smiled. "Cold?"

I stepped in close to him and inhaled deeply. "You smell good," I said. And I licked one of the droplets of water off his neck. He took a breath and looked down at me. The eyebrow was still in place.

"Feeling brave?" he asked casually.

I found another drop and took care of it. Couldn't have him going to bed all wet, I thought. He might get sick or something. Really, I was doing this for his benefit. Okay, and mine too. I was selfish. "It's my new image," I said. "The brave new Stephanie."

"Lucky me," he said, and closed his eyes as I got a drop that was dangerously close to his nipple.

He caught my wrist in his hand and looked into my eyes. "Is this an invitation?"

"An open one," I said, shocking myself because I meant it. I wanted him, all the time, and now I could have him. Anytime I wanted. Lucky _me_.

"So I guess I don't need to sleep in the boxers, then."

I narrowed my eyes at another droplet by his earlobe, and licked it away gently with the tip of my tongue. "Mmm, it'll just make things more difficult for me. But if you really want to get dressed all over again…"

Those were the last thought-out words I spoke. Ranger took my mouth in a deep kiss, maneuvered me to the bed and out of my clothes, and made me forget the rest of the world for the next four hours.

Out of breath and trembling, I smiled when he finally gathered me into the shelter of his body. He held me close and kissed my forehead. "You were right," I said into his shoulder.

"About what?" His voice smoothed over me like silk.

"Ruining me for other men." Ever, I added silently.

Ranger made what I think was a sigh. "I told you my life doesn't lend itself to relationships," he started.

"I know," I jumped in, hoping I hadn't pushed too much. "I don't mean that, I just--"

"Let me finish," he said, putting a finger under my chin and pushing my mouth closed. "I said, my life doesn't lend itself to relationships. I told you before, I only had working relationships." He rubbed a hand up and down my back, warming me through to my toes.

"And ours is still a working relationship. But I think you know we both feel more than that."

I couldn't believe my ears. I'd just had this same epiphany not six hours before. How the hell long had he known? Would have been nice if he'd let _me_ know this privy bit of information, I thought with a mental sigh.

"I try to protect you, keep you safe. I watched you and Morelli get together and split again and again. I even kept my mouth shut when I found out he was stepping out on you," he said, tension and a bit of anger lacing his voice. "But when I walked in your apartment and saw you on the floor like that, I decided I didn't want just to keep you safe. That meant being involved from a distance."

He went quiet for a few minutes, but I didn't dare speak. I didn't want to break whatever spell he was under. The fingers on my back stilled for a moment, and I burrowed into his shoulder. It seemed right that my head fit so perfectly there. And then he spoke again.

"I can't tell you that this will work," he said. "My life is hell on people who are close to me. What I'm suggesting is we take this as it comes. I told you before that I loved you, and I meant it. It doesn't come with a ring attached. But I can tell you that I want you, babe." He pressed a kiss to the top of my head. "I don't want you to live in one of the studios. I want you to live here. And I don't want you to go back to Morelli. You belong to me," he said firmly, and my mouth dropped.

I sat straight up and gaped at him. "You love me."

"I love you," he said.

I couldn't believe this. He really did have ESP, I thought. "Well, I, uh…Shit. I love you, too."

This got me the full-on, two hundred watt grin. It lit up the dark room, and his white teeth gleamed. "Finally figured it out?"

"I'm slow on the uptake," I said, snuggling back down next to him. My world was reeling. Not only had I just been shown heaven, now I was getting the moon and the stars, too. I sighed, and kissed his shoulder. "So we're going to take this slow. One step at a time. No terms and conditions apply."

"The terms and conditions are we give each other what we're capable of giving and don't blame each other for what we can't."

I thought about this for a moment. "That sounds hard."

"Any relationship with me will be hard," he said. "I'm no picnic."

"Well, I don't know about that," I said, kissing his neck. "You sure taste good."

He laughed quietly and rolled me over onto my back. I felt his teeth graze my neck in return, and shivered. "Really."

I linked my arms around his neck. "Yup. Yum."

"I taste better in some places than others," he said, nipping my earlobe.

Oh boy.

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